I don't agree with his analysis of the story but the lesson he learns is eternally true...
It happened once that Rabbi Elazar son of Rabbi Shimon from Migdal Gedor went away from his rabbi's home. He was very happy, and he was feeling great pride because he had learned so much Torah.
As he traveled, he met a man who was very ugly. He said, "Man, how ugly you are! Are all the people of your city as ugly as you?" The man replied, "I really would not know. Go to the artist who made me and tell Him how ugly a vessel He has made."
Rabbi Elazar realized that he had sinned. He got down from his donkey and bowed down to the man. "I made a mistake and failed, forgive me!" But the man was stubborn. He said, "I do not forgive you.
"Go to the artist who made me and tell Him how ugly a vessel He has made."
The people of the city begged the man to forgive Rabbi Elazar, and in the end he finally agreed. But he told the rabbi, "I forgive you on condition that you do not make a habit of doing such things."
(Source: Taanit 20a).
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This strange story bothered me for many years. What happened to Rabbi Elazar that made him decide to disturb the ugly man and to tease him? How did Rabbi Elazar, an important Tana and a righteous man, fall into such a childish and foolish trap? How could he attack a stranger and call him ugly to his face?
The question is even greater than that. In the end, when the man finally agrees to accept the rabbi's apology he gives the rabbi a condition to fulfill, "Don't do it again," he says. Was this condition really necessary? Why would anybody suspect that Rabbi Elazar might be ready to repeat his terrible mistake?
At a Purim celebration at one-thirty in the middle of the night, I found an answer to my question. I cannot remember who I was speaking to and what we were talking about. I was lightly intoxicated, as was my friend. We spoke about the essence of mankind, when an answer to my question suddenly popped into my head.
What I suddenly understood was not a simple explanation. The night of Purim is not the time for simple insights of the type revealed every day. A great secret was revealed to me that night, a deep insight into the strange story of Rabbi Elazar. Even if it is not a simple idea, it is clearly the absolute truth.
* * * * * *
Just whom did Rabbi Elazar meet that night? Who is the Jew who was given the tile of "ugly"? The answer is really very simple. The ugly person was none other than Rabbi Elazar himself! Rabbi Elazar was feeling pride. He felt very good. That being the case, he took hold of himself and looked inside, in a mood of abject self-criticism.
"Why are you so satisfied with yourself?" he said. "You are full of faults and failures. So what if you studied Torah? In the end, you are very ugly." That is what Rabbi Elazar said to himself, taking on a huge dose of internal criticism.
We often criticize our own actions. We sometimes even come to the conclusion that we are ugly, that we are worthless. A few years ago, a famous singer sang, "I am nothing! I am nothing! That is what I shouted out to everybody at a party." At a moment of crisis, we tend to disparage our own selves. We sometimes even start to hate our own selves.
In reaction to this harsh analysis, Rabbi Elazar scolded himself. To say that you are ugly means to say that G-d created an ugly vessel. To say that you are ugly is to speak out against the Holy One, Blessed be He. You are not the master of your own self, you were fashioned by the Creator. Who gave you permission to show contempt for a creature made by the Creator of the world!
We are not allowed to show contempt for our own selves. We were created by the Holy One, Blessed be He. Even though we can criticize our actions, we must remember that we are children of a King, we have been fashioned out of precious stones and jewels.
In the end of the story, Rabbi Elazar forgave himself, on one condition. He accepted that he would never repeat this sin any more. He accepted the condition that he would never again call himself ugly or say that he is worthless.
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We are often told that there is no such thing as a bad boy, there are only boys who are having a bad time. This is certainly very true, but not only with respect to others – it is true for us too. We are not really bad. We are good, even though we sometimes stumble and fall. We are not ugly and we are not worthless.
We must never call another person ugly, he is the handiwork of the great Creator. We must also never call ourselves ugly – we too are the handiwork of the Creator...
