R' Moshe Shilat Shabbat Bi-shabato Vayigash
With respect to the reunification of Yosef and his younger brother Binyamin, we are told in this week's Torah portion, "And he fell on the neck of his brother Binyamin and wept, and Binyamin wept on his neck" [Bereishit 45:14].
The sages teach us that Yosef wept for the two Temples which would be built in the heritage of Binyamin and would later be destroyed, while Binyamin wept for the Tabernacle at Shilo, which would be in Yosef's heritage and also would be destroyed.
However, according to the principle that "every man is closest to himself," it is hard to understand why each one cried about the Temple in the area belonging to his brother and not about the Temple in his own heritage. The explanation for this is related to the emphasis in the above verse, that each one cried on the neck of the other one.
"It Lies between His Shoulders"
The following appears in the Midrash with respect to the verse, "Your neck is like the Tower of David" [Shir Hashirim 4:4] - "Just as the neck is at the top of a man, so the Temple lies at the top of the world."
At first glance this appears to be lacking something. If the purpose of the verse is to express the great height and the importance of the Temple, the image of a neck is not the best one. The neck is not the highest part of a person, since the head is higher.
A similar question can be asked about another verse which involves the Temple, "It lies between his shoulders" [Devarim 33:12]. Rashi comments, "At the high point of his (Binyamin's) land the Temple was built, although it was twenty-three Amot below Ein Itam." Again the praise of the Temple is that it is in a high place, but not the highest one.
The Rebbe of Lubavitch explains that this is on purpose and that it has a very deep significance. The Temple is specifically compared to a neck, because the role of the Temple is exactly what is symbolized by the neck.
The Neck – A Focus of Decision-Making
Chassidut teaches us that there is no point in deep thought and insight for its own sake. The essence and role of such matters is so that man will rule his body and his actions according to the proper conclusions. From this point of view, the "neck" is a symbol of the control point of the intellect over the body. On one hand, it is the neck and not the head, but on the other hand it is higher than the body and symbolizes the transfer of instructions to the body.
Just this is the role of the Temple, which has been given the task of transferring the Divine light into the world. It is also the role of the Temple which lies within every single person – "Let them make a Tabernacle for me, and I will dwell within them" [Shemot 24:8] – He will dwell within each and every person. The "head" is the soul, "which clings and attaches between the Unique One and every individual." It is linked to G-d, who is above the world. With respect to the Temple in every person's heart, it is necessary to empower the soul to lead the body here, in this world.
One is Permitted to Weep for Another
The destruction of the public Temple stems from the destruction of the individual Temple, as is expressed by the sages in our prayers, "Because of our sins we were expelled from our land."
On the topic of our individual Temples, there is no point in crying, we are duty bound to rise up and to take action! We must get our bearings and start to rebuild the Temple – to study Torah and strengthen our service of G-d. Weeping might even cause harm and weaken our spirits. On the other hand, with respect to the personal Temple of a friend, it is important for you to wake him up and to help him to mend his ways in any way possible, keeping to a pleasant path and in a calm way. However, in the end you do not directly control his actions, and he will always have free choice. From the point of view of mutual love of all of Yisrael, it is right for you to weep about the destruction of a friend's personal Temple and to pray that he will wake up and rebuild his Temple.
These then are the two lessons that the Midrash teaches us about the fact that Yosef and Binyamin weep over each other's necks. With respect to your own Temple, you should not weep, it is your task to rise up and rebuild it. With respect to your brother's Temple, its destruction should touch you so deeply that you weep!
