Non-Torah people succumb to their תאוות המין. They talk about it freely, gaze at it, think about it, fantasize about it, read about it, and when given the opportunity act upon it.
The Torah doesn't want us to be monks. We are supposed to marry and live healthy lives. However, outside of the very specific times, and outside of one's wife, everything else is completely forbidden.
This is a challenge because it involves overcoming a very basic biological mechanism. There are various strategies.
One is to stress how impure and defiled one becomes when succumbing. That is true and at times effective.
But there is a more elevated and constructive approach. A person must fill himself with a powerful desire, with an insatiable thirst, for KEDUSHA. That G-DLY PASSION for kedusha will vanquish all other passions, which will then dissipate like smoke. When we talk about a "tzadik shomer bris" we are not talking about a guy who doesn't watch movies because his Rov paskened that it is forbidden or he doesn't go to Central Park on a hot Sunday afternoon because he knows that it will contaminate his soul.
No.
He stays away from pritzus because he wants to be holy will all of his heart and all of his soul.
In the words of the Rav Ztz"l:
עוצם הקדושה היא הגברת התשוקה האלהית ואור הרוחני ברצון האדם וטבעו, עד שהחפץ של הקודש והמגמה האלהית יהיה יותר עמוק בנפש מכל הרצונות הטבעייות. ומי שבא עד למדה העליונה, שהחפץ האלהי הוא גדול ומכריע בקדושתו גם את הנטיה המינית, זהו צדיק דנטיר ברית. והכרעה זו באה לא בדרך עקירת הטבע הרוחני והגופני, כי אם ברוממות אל התעודה השכלית, המוארה באורה האלהית
ש"ק א שכ"ט
We can TRY getting there. We might not get ALL the way there but we will surely get much closer than we would had we not tried....
רשומה זו מקדשת לכבוד בורא העולם שרחמיו לא כלו וחסדיו לא תמו ועושה לי ישועות באופן תמידי
