הכח של עם ישראל

 אחד‭ ‬הדברים‭ ‬שהיינו‭ ‬עסוקים‭ ‬בהם‭ ‬לפני‭ ‬המלחמה‭ ‬היה‭ ‬מלחמה‭ ‬על‭ ‬הזהות‭ ‬היהודית‭ ‬שלנו‭.‬

קשה‭ ‬להתעלם‭ ‬מכך‭ ‬שחלק‭ ‬גדול‭ ‬מהשבויים‭ ‬שלנו‭ ‬שחוזרים‭ ‬מהשבי‭, ‬למרות‭ ‬הקשיים‭ ‬שעברו‭ ‬הם‭ ‬באים‭ ‬עם‭ ‬אור‭ ‬גדול‭ ‬וחיבור‭ ‬מדהים‭ ‬לזהותם‭ ‬היהודית‭.‬

כשאמילי‭ ‬דמארי‭ ‬הגיעה‭ ‬לכותל‭ ‬המערבי‭ ‬היא‭ ‬התפללה‭ ‬לשובם‭ ‬של‭ ‬חבריה‭ ‬גלי‭ ‬וזיוי‭ ‬ברמן‭, ‬ובירכה‭ ‬ברכת‭ ‬הגומל‭ ‬על‭ ‬חזרתה‭ ‬מהתופת‭. ‬‮"‬בלילה‭ ‬של‭ ‬ערב‭ ‬יום‭ ‬כיפור‭ ‬הצלחתי‭ ‬להאזין‭ ‬לרדיו‮"‬‭, ‬סיפרה‭. ‬‮"‬התרגשתי‭ ‬לשמוע‭ ‬את‭ ‬הסליחות‭ ‬ששודרו‭ ‬מרחבת‭ ‬הכותל‭ ‬ואת‭ ‬התפילות‭ ‬שנשאו‭ ‬שם‭ ‬עבורנו‭. ‬זה‭ ‬נתן‭ ‬לי‭ ‬כוח‭ ‬ותקווה‮"‬‭.‬

משפחתו‭ ‬של‭ ‬אוהד‭ ‬בן‭ ‬עמי‭ ‬סיפרה‭ ‬שבשבת‭ ‬הראשונה‭ ‬בבית‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬עשה‭ ‬קידוש‭ ‬והבדלה‭. ‬כך‭ ‬סיפר‭ ‬גם‭ ‬יחי‭, ‬אביה‭ ‬של‭ ‬ארבל‭ ‬יהוד‭, ‬כששבה‭ ‬הביתה‭. ‬

התצפיתניות‭ ‬ששבו‭ ‬תיארו‭ ‬איך‭ ‬השתדלו‭ ‬לא‭ ‬לאכול‭ ‬חמץ‭ ‬בפסח‭, ‬ואיך‭ ‬צמו‭ ‬ביום‭ ‬כיפור‭. ‬כמוהם‭ ‬גם‭ ‬שבויים‭ ‬נוספים‭ ‬שתיארו‭ ‬את‭ ‬הניסיון‭ ‬לצום‭ ‬בשבי‭. ‬רק‭ ‬שילוב‭ ‬המילים‭ ‬הללו‭ ‬בלתי‭ ‬נתפס‭. ‬מי‭ ‬שהורעבו‭ ‬חודשים‭ ‬ארוכים‭, ‬וצמו‭ ‬בעל‭ ‬כורחם‭ ‬בגלל‭ ‬שובים‭ ‬אכזריים‭, ‬בחרו‭ ‬להימנע‭ ‬מאוכל‭. ‬אחרים‭ ‬תיארו‭ ‬את‭ ‬הניסיון‭ ‬לעשות‭ ‬קידוש‭ ‬במנהרות‭ ‬חמאס‭. ‬לספור‭ ‬את‭ ‬הימים‭, ‬וכשמגיע‭ ‬יום‭ ‬השבת‭ ‬לנסות‭ ‬לדקלם‭ ‬מהראש‭ ‬את‭ ‬מה‭ ‬שזוכרים‭.‬

עמיתיו‭ ‬לשבי‭ ‬של‭ ‬עומר‭ ‬שם‭ ‬טוב‭ ‬סיפרו‭ ‬על‭ ‬היצירתיות‭ ‬שלו‭ ‬בשבי‭. ‬הוא‭ ‬הניח‭ ‬על‭ ‬ראשו‭ ‬נייר‭ ‬טואלט‭ ‬בתור‭ ‬כיפה‭, ‬בייגלה‭ ‬עבש‭ ‬בתור‭ ‬לחם‭, ‬ופירורי‭ ‬המלח‭ ‬מהבייגלה‭ ‬הופרדו‭ ‬בשביל‭ ‬להטביל‭ ‬את‭ ‬הלחם‭ ‬בברכת‭ ‬‮"‬המוציא‮"‬‭. ‬והיו‭ ‬מי‭ ‬שגם‭ ‬בייגלה‭ ‬לא‭ ‬היה‭ ‬להם‭, ‬את‭ ‬הקידוש‭ ‬עשו‭ ‬על‭ ‬פקק‭ ‬עם‭ ‬מעט‭ ‬מים‭ ‬מעופשים‭, ‬כשהם‭ ‬כבולים‭ ‬בשלשלאות‭.‬

02‭ ‬

מלחמות‭ ‬אכזריות‭ ‬מובילות‭ ‬לא‭ ‬פעם‭ ‬להתעוררות‭ ‬של‭ ‬אמונה‭, ‬או‭ ‬לחלופין‭ ‬להתרחקות‭. ‬אבל‭ ‬עבור‭ ‬רבים‭, ‬‮"‬אם‭ ‬אין‭ ‬לאן‭ ‬לשאת‭ ‬עיניים‭ – ‬תסתכל‭ ‬לשמיים‭.‬‮"‬‭ ‬נדמה‭ ‬שסיפורי‭ ‬השבים‭ ‬ובני‭ ‬משפחותיהם‭ ‬מספרים‭ ‬לנו‭ ‬דבר‭ ‬נוסף‭, ‬שהוא‭ ‬לא‭ ‬בהכרח‭ ‬דתי‭, ‬אלא‭ ‬קשור‭ ‬לזהות‭ ‬ותרבות‭.‬

שורדת‭ ‬השבי‭ ‬אגם‭ ‬ברגר‭, ‬ששוחררה‭ ‬במסגרת‭ ‬הפעימה‭ ‬הראשונה‭ ‬של‭ ‬עסקת‭ ‬החטופים‭, ‬נפגשה‭ ‬עם‭ ‬הרבנית‭ ‬צילי‭ ‬שניידר‭ ‬יו"ר‭ ‬ארגון‭ ‬‮'‬קשר‭ ‬יהודי‮'‬‭ ‬ושיתפה‭ ‬אותה‭ ‬בחוויות‭ ‬המטלטלות‭ ‬מהשבי‭, ‬ההקפדה‭ ‬על‭ ‬שמירת‭ ‬מצוות‭ ‬והאמונה‭ ‬האיתנה‭ ‬שהחזיקה‭ ‬אותה‭ ‬בתנאים‭ ‬קשים‭ ‬ביותר‭.‬

ברגר‭ ‬סיפרה‭ ‬כי‭ ‬לפני‭ ‬כשנה‭ ‬הופתעו‭ ‬החטופות‭ ‬לגלות‭ ‬שמחבלי‭ ‬חמאס‭ ‬העבירו‭ ‬להם‭ ‬חפצים‭ ‬שונים‭, ‬ביניהם‭ ‬סידור‭ ‬תפילה‭. ‬‮"‬לא‭ ‬ברור‭ ‬לנו‭ ‬איך‭ ‬זה‭ ‬קרה‭, ‬אבל‭ ‬פשוט‭ ‬הביאו‭ ‬לנו‭ ‬סידורים‮"‬‭, ‬היא‭ ‬מספרת‭. ‬‮"‬הם‭ ‬הראו‭ ‬לנו‭ ‬את‭ ‬זה‭ ‬ואמרו‭ ‬‮'‬קחו‮'‬‭. ‬השתמשנו‭ ‬בזה‭ ‬המון‭, ‬זה‭ ‬נתן‭ ‬לנו‭ ‬כוח‮"‬‭.‬

למרות‭ ‬הנסיבות‭ ‬והמצב‭ ‬הקשה‭, ‬הן‭ ‬ניסו‭ ‬כמיטב‭ ‬יכולתן‭ ‬לעקוב‭ ‬אחר‭ ‬לוח‭ ‬השנה‭ ‬ולשמור‭ ‬את‭ ‬החגים‭. ‬‮"‬ידענו‭ ‬בערך‭ ‬את‭ ‬התאריכים‭ ‬לפי‭ ‬הרדיו‭ ‬ולפעמים‭ ‬דרך‭ ‬קטעים‭ ‬שהוקרנו‭ ‬בטלוויזיה‭. ‬זה‭ ‬עזר‭ ‬לנו‭ ‬להבין‭ ‬פחות‭ ‬או‭ ‬יותר‭ ‬מתי‭ ‬החגים‭ ‬מתקרבים‮"‬‭.‬

‮"‬פספסנו‭ ‬את‭ ‬חנוכה‭, ‬אבל‭ ‬בפסח‭ ‬לפחות‭ ‬הצלחתי‭ ‬לשמור‭ ‬ולא‭ ‬לאכול‭ ‬חמץ‮"‬‭, ‬היא‭ ‬מספרת‭. ‬‮"‬השתמשתי‭ ‬בקמח‭ ‬תירס‮"‬‭. ‬

על‭ ‬המחבלים‭ ‬שהחזיקו‭ ‬בה‭ ‬אמרה‭ ‬‮"‬הם‭ ‬שונאים‭ ‬יהודים‭, ‬אבל‭ ‬מבחינתם‭ ‬עדיף‭ ‬להיות‭ ‬דתיים‭ ‬מאשר‭ ‬לא‭ ‬להאמין‭ ‬בכלל‮"‬‭.‬

יום‭ ‬כיפור‭ ‬היה‭ ‬אחד‭ ‬הרגעים‭ ‬המשמעותיים‭ ‬ביותר‭ ‬עבורה‭. ‬‮"‬הצלחנו‭ ‬לשמור‭ ‬על‭ ‬הצום‭, ‬ואני‭ ‬זוכרת‭ ‬שהתפללנו‭ ‬המון‭ ‬באותו‭ ‬יום‭. ‬גם‭ ‬בתענית‭ ‬אסתר‭ ‬צמתי‭.‬‭ ‬הרגשתי‭ ‬שזה‭ ‬משהו‭ ‬שאני‭ ‬חייבת‭ ‬לעשות‭, ‬במיוחד‭ ‬במצב‭ ‬שהיינו‭ ‬בו‮"‬‭.‬

למרות‭ ‬הקשיים‭, ‬היא‭ ‬מספרת‭ ‬כי‭ ‬היא‭ ‬אסירת‭ ‬תודה‭ ‬על‭ ‬כל‭ ‬מי‭ ‬שתמך‭ ‬בה‭ ‬במהלך‭ ‬התקופה‭ ‬הקשה‭, ‬ושואבת‭ ‬כוחות‭ ‬מתוך‭ ‬האמונה‭ ‬שעזרה‭ ‬לה‭ ‬לשרוד‭. ‬‮"‬אני‭ ‬לא‭ ‬יודעת‭ ‬איך‭ ‬הייתי‭ ‬עוברת‭ ‬את‭ ‬זה‭ ‬בלי‭ ‬האמונה‭ ‬שלי‭. ‬בסופו‭ ‬של‭ ‬דבר‭, ‬זה‭ ‬מה‭ ‬שנתן‭ ‬לי‭ ‬תקווה‮"‬

דניאלה‭ ‬גלבוע‭ ‬סיפרה‭: ‬‮'‬ידעתי‭ ‬שהדבר‭ ‬היחיד‭ ‬שיכול‭ ‬להציל‭ ‬אותנו‭ ‬זה‭ ‬האמונה‮'‬‭ ‬היא‭ ‬המשיכה‭ ‬ואמרה‭ ‬‮'‬באחד‭ ‬הבקרים‭ ‬לאחר‭ ‬השחרור‭ ‬קראנו‭, ‬אני‭, ‬קרינה‭,‬‭ ‬נעמה‭, ‬לירי‭ ‬ואגם‭ ‬את‭ ‬ברכת‭ ‬הגומל‭ ‬בבית‭ ‬הכנסת‭, ‬לרגע‭ ‬הזה‭ ‬חיכיתי‭ ‬מהיום‭ ‬ששרדתי‭ ‬את‭ ‬השבעה‭ ‬באוקטובר‭, ‬להודות‭ ‬לה‮'‬‭ ‬שכנגד‭ ‬כל‭ ‬הסיכויים‭ ‬הציל‭ ‬אותנו‭ ‬מהדבר‭ ‬הנורא‭ ‬מכל‮'‬

03‭ ‬

אסיים‭ ‬בדברים‭ ‬שאמר‭ ‬אוהד‭ ‬בן‭ ‬עמי‭ ‬לאחר‭ ‬שחזר‭ ‬מהשבי‭ ‬כשהתפילין‭ ‬על‭ ‬ראשו‭:‬

‮'‬בפנים‭ ‬אנחנו‭ ‬עם‭ ‬מאוד‭ ‬מאוד‭ ‬חזק‭ ‬ומה‭ ‬שמאחד‭ ‬אותנו‭ ‬זאת‭ ‬האמונה‭ ‬באלוקים‭, ‬שאותי‭ ‬היא‭ ‬לפחות‭ ‬באופן‭ ‬אישי‭ ‬החזיקה‭ ‬והצילה‭ ‬ובזכות‭ ‬אלוקים‭ ‬אני‭ ‬נמצא‭ ‬פה‭ ‬בחזרה‭ ‬אחרי‭ ‬השבי‭, ‬כנראה‭ ‬שהייתי‭ ‬צריך‭ ‬כמה‭ ‬דברים‭ ‬לתקן‭, ‬הדבר‭ ‬הזה‭ ‬רק‭ ‬מחזק‭ ‬אותי‭. ‬זה‭ ‬המסר‭ ‬שלי‭ ‬לעם‭ ‬ישראל‭, ‬האמונה‭ ‬שלנו‭ ‬היא‭ ‬מה‭ ‬שמאחד‭ ‬אותנו‭ ‬והיא‭ ‬גם‭ ‬מה‭ ‬שנותן‭ ‬לנו‭ ‬כח‭ ‬ברגעים‭ ‬שאנחנו‭ ‬הכי‭ ‬הכי‭ ‬מושפלים‭  ‬והכי‭ ‬מרוסקים‭. ‬אנחנו‭ ‬כאן‭ ‬בשביל‭ ‬לנצח‭ ‬ונמשיך‭ ‬להילחם‭, ‬להאבק‭ ‬וננצח‭! ‬אנחנו‭ ‬מתפללים‭ ‬עד‭ ‬שאחרון‭ ‬החטופים‭ ‬יחזור‭ ‬הביתה‭ ‬בעזרת‭ ‬ה‮'‬‭.‬‭ ‬■

אורי שכטר

הגאון ר' ראובן מרגליות זצ"ל

 דמות מעיר התורה תל-אביב

בימים‭ ‬אלו‭ ‬נלמדת‭ ‬מסכת‭ ‬סנהדרין‭ ‬במסגרת‭ ‬הדף‭ ‬היומי‭, ‬וחידושים‭ ‬מתוקים‭ ‬ומקוריים‭ ‬מספרי‭ ‬״מרגליות‭ ‬הים״‭ ‬של‭ ‬ר׳‭ ‬ראובן‭ ‬מרגליות‭ ‬על‭ ‬המסכת‭, ‬נשמעים‭ ‬בבתי‭ ‬המדרש‭. ‬הרב‭ ‬ראובן‭ ‬מרגליות‭ ‬היה‭ ‬גאון‭ ‬שכל‭ ‬התורה‭ ‬מונחת‭ ‬אצלו‭ ‬כבקופסה‭, ‬והוא‭ ‬כמעיין‭ ‬המתגבר‭, ‬אבל‭ ‬את‭ ‬הכתיבה‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬השכיל‭ ‬לצמצם‭ ‬בלשון‭ ‬בהירה‭ ‬ומובנת‭ ‬לכל‭. ‬סיפרה‭ ‬לי‭ ‬גב׳‭ ‬לאה‭ ‬סרלואי‭, ‬ילידת‭ ‬תל‭ ‬אביב‭ ‬ואחותו‭ ‬של‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬ישעיהו‭ ‬הדרי‭, ‬שהיה‭ ‬ראש‭ ‬ישיבת‭ ‬הכותל‭: ‬׳ר׳‭ ‬ראובן‭ ‬מרגליות‭ ‬לא‭ ‬זכה‭ ‬לפרי‭ ‬בטן‭. ‬אחי‭ ‬סיפר‭ ‬לי‭ ‬שר׳‭ ‬ראובן‭ ‬היה‭ ‬מסתובב‭ ‬אצל‭ ‬אדמו״רים‭ ‬וצדיקים‭ ‬שיתפללו‭ ‬עליו‭. ‬אדמו״ר‭ ‬אחד‭ ‬אמר‭ ‬לו‭ ‬שאם‭ ‬יעזוב‭ ‬את‭ ‬תנועת‭ ‬״המזרחי״‭ ‬יזכה‭ ‬לפרי‭ ‬בטן‭, ‬והוא‭ ‬השיב‭ ‬בנחרצות‭ ‬שלא‭ ‬ימכור‭ ‬את‭ ‬נשמתו‭…‬׳‭ ‬

מדוע‭ ‬״נשמתו״‭? ‬סיפר‭ ‬לי‭ ‬קרובו‭ ‬ובן‭ ‬ביתו‭, ‬חנניה‭ ‬וינברגר‭ ‬מרחובות‭: ‬׳מעולם‭ ‬לא‭ ‬ראיתיו‭ ‬כועס‭, ‬מלבד‭ ‬פעם‭ ‬אחת‭, ‬כשהחזן‭ ‬בבית‭ ‬הכנסת‭ ‬החסידי‭ ‬שברח׳‭ ‬יבנה‭ ‬בת״א‭, ‬עמד‭ ‬לדלג‭ ‬על‭ ‬ההלל‭ ‬של‭ ‬יום‭ ‬העצמאות‭. ‬הוא‭ ‬ניגש‭ ‬לחזן‭, ‬העבירו‭ ‬ממקומו‭, ‬ולפני‭ ‬התיבה‭ ‬עבר‭ ‬הדיין‭ ‬רבי‭ ‬יונה‭ ‬הוכמן‭ ‬עם‭ ‬תפילת‭ ‬ההלל‭. ‬ר׳‭ ‬ראובן‭ ‬ראה‭ ‬בחוסר‭ ‬אמירת‭ ‬ההלל‭ ‬כפיות‭ ‬טובה‭. ‬בסוכת‭ ‬בית‭ ‬הכנסת‭ ‬התקיים‭ ‬מנין‭ ‬מקביל‭, ‬לכל‭ ‬המעוניין‭, ‬שבו‭ ‬לא‭ ‬אמרו‭ ‬את‭ ‬ההלל׳‭. ‬

והוסיף‭: ‬׳כשהעלו‭ ‬את‭ ‬עצמותיו‭ ‬של‭ ‬זאב‭ ‬ז׳בוטינסקי‭ ‬לארץ‭, ‬בשנת‭ ‬תשכ״ד‭, ‬נערכה‭ ‬לו‭ ‬קבלת‭ ‬פנים‭ ‬בשדה‭ ‬התעופה‭ ‬בן‭ ‬גוריון‭. ‬על‭ ‬במת‭ ‬עץ‭ ‬קטנה‭, ‬כעין‭ ‬ארגז‭ ‬מוגבה‭ ‬של‭ ‬15‭ ‬ס״מ‭, ‬עמדו‭ ‬ר׳‭ ‬אריה‭ ‬לוין‭, ‬דודי‭ ‬ר׳‭ ‬ראובן‭ ‬מרגליות‭ ‬וח״כ‭ ‬מנחם‭ ‬בגין‭. ‬הייתה‭ ‬שם‭ ‬גם‭ ‬ח״כ‭ ‬גאולה‭ ‬כהן‭. ‬תפילה‭ ‬מיוחדת‭ ‬נשא‭ ‬החזן‭ ‬התל‭-‬אביבי‭ ‬בנימין‭ ‬אונגר‭. ‬ראשי‭ ‬המדינה‭ ‬של‭ ‬אז‭ ‬בלטו‭ ‬בהיעדרם‭…‬

יחד‭ ‬עם‭ ‬השקפת‭ ‬עולם‭ ‬חדה‭ ‬זו‭ ‬של‭ ‬ר׳‭ ‬ראובן‭, ‬הייתה‭ ‬הערצה‭ ‬הדדית‭ ‬בינו‭ ‬לבין‭ ‬החזו״א‭ ‬ועוד‭ ‬גדולי‭ ‬עולם‭ ‬בעלי‭ ‬השקפות‭ ‬שונות‭. ‬ר׳‭ ‬חיים‭ ‬קנייבסקי‭ ‬העיד‭ ‬שהחזו״א‭ ‬אמר‭ ‬עליו‭ ‬שהוא‭ ‬למדן‭ ‬גדול‭, ‬ושהוא‭ ‬עצמו‭ ‬אינו‭ ‬יודע‭ ‬כמה‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬יודע‭. ‬גם‭ ‬ר׳‭ ‬חיים‭ ‬עצמו‭ ‬אמר‭ ‬שהכירו‭ ‬ככזה‭, ‬אישית‭ ‬ומתוך‭ ‬ספריו‭ ‬הרבים‭. ‬היו‭ ‬שהחשיבוהו‭ ‬כבקיא‭ ‬הגדול‭ ‬בדורו׳‭. ‬

בשנת‭ ‬תרצ״ג‭ ‬עלה‭ ‬ארצה‭ ‬חלוץ‭ ‬ששמו‭ ‬נפתלי‭ ‬קליגר‭. ‬עם‭ ‬עלייתו‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬התגורר‭ ‬בתל‭-‬אביב‭ ‬ועבד‭ ‬בה‭ ‬כפועל‭. ‬הוא‭ ‬זכה‭ ‬לאריכות‭ ‬ימים‭ ‬ולבנים‭ ‬תלמידי‭ ‬חכמים‭. ‬פעם‭ ‬שאלתי‭ ‬אותו‭ ‬אם‭ ‬הכיר‭ ‬את‭ ‬ר׳‭ ‬ראובן‭ ‬מתל‭-‬אביב‭, ‬מאותם‭ ‬הימים‭. ‬׳מתל‭-‬אביב‭?? ‬עוד‭ ‬מלבוב‭ ‬שבפולין‭ ‬הכרתי‭ ‬אותו‭! ‬הייתי‭ ‬נכנס‭ ‬לחנות‭ ‬הספרים‭ ‬שלו‭, ‬כבחור‭ ‬בן‭ ‬13-14‭, ‬לא‭ ‬כדי‭ ‬לקנות‭ ‬ספר‭, ‬אלא‭ ‬כדי‭ ‬להרגיש‭ ‬את‭ ‬האווירה‭ ‬המיוחדת‭ ‬של‭ ‬בית‭ ‬ועד‭ ‬לחכמים‭, ‬לשמוע‭ ‬שיחותיהם‭. ‬כנראה‭ ‬שלא‭ ‬רק‭ ‬אני‭ ‬לא‭ ‬הייתי‭ ‬בא‭ ‬לקנות‭, ‬אלא‭ ‬גם‭ ‬תלמידי‭ ‬חכמים‭ ‬גדולים‭ ‬היו‭ ‬באים‭ ‬לשאול‭ ‬מקור‭, ‬לברר‭ ‬גרסה‭, ‬לשמוע‭ ‬על‭ ‬ספר‭ ‬פלוני‭ ‬או‭ ‬מחבר‭ ‬אלמוני‭…‬׳

ר׳‭ ‬ראובן‭ ‬היה‭ ‬המנהל‭ ‬הראשון‭ ‬של‭ ‬ספריית‭ ‬הרמב״ם‭ ‬בתל‭-‬אביב‭. ‬מדי‭ ‬פעם‭ ‬אני‭ ‬לוקח‭ ‬כמה‭ ‬מתלמידיי‭ ‬לספריה‭ ‬זו‭, ‬ואני‭ ‬רואה‭ ‬את‭ ‬ההלם‭ ‬על‭ ‬פניהם‭, ‬את‭ ‬התרוצצות‭ ‬המחשבה‭, ‬את‭ ‬שאלת‭ ‬ה״ממה‭ ‬מתחילים‭?‬״‭ ‬הם‭ ‬מעולם‭ ‬לא‭ ‬דמיינו‭ ‬עושר‭ ‬כזה‭ ‬בארון‭ ‬הספרים‭ ‬היהודי‭, ‬על‭ ‬שלל‭ ‬תחומיו‭. ‬ואולי‭ ‬ההלם‭ ‬הזה‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬התפקיד‭ ‬הראשון‭ ‬של‭ ‬ספרייה‭ ‬תורנית‭ ‬כזו‭ ‬‮–‬‭ ‬לייצר‭ ‬את‭ ‬תחושת‭ ‬ה״קטונתי״‭ ‬בפני‭ ‬השגב‭ ‬הזה‭ ‬של‭ ‬חכמת‭ ‬היהדות‭.‬

02‭ ‬

דמויות מעיר התורה ירושלים 

את‭ ‬הדברים‭ ‬הבאים‭ ‬אני‭ ‬כותב‭ ‬ביום‭ ‬היארצייט‭ ‬של‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬אברהם‭ ‬רמר‭, ‬תלמיד‭ ‬הרצי״ה‭ ‬קוק‭, ‬שזכיתי‭ ‬ללמוד‭ ‬אצלו‭ ‬בילדותי‭. ‬לימוד‭ ‬ספר‭ ‬ישעיהו‭ ‬אצלו‭ ‬כלל‭ ‬תרגום‭ ‬להווה‭, ‬להראות‭ ‬כיצד‭ ‬״דבר‭ ‬אחד‭ ‬מדבריך‭ ‬אחור‭ ‬לא‭ ‬ישוב‭ ‬ריקם״‭. ‬כשלמדנו‭ ‬את‭ ‬הפסוק‭ ‬בישעיהו‭: ‬״כי‭ ‬מציון‭ ‬תצא‭ ‬תורה‭… ‬מירושלים״‭, ‬הוא‭ ‬אמר‭ ‬לנו‭: ‬תראו‭ ‬איך‭ ‬הנבואה‭ ‬הזו‭ ‬מתגשמת‭ ‬ממש‭ ‬בדורנו‭, ‬כאשר‭ ‬מרכז‭ ‬התורה‭ ‬העולמי‭ ‬היום‭ ‬כבר‭ ‬עבר‭ ‬לארץ‭ ‬ישראל‭, ‬ולירושלים‭ ‬דווקא‭. ‬

נזכרתי‭ ‬בדברים‭ ‬אלו‭ ‬אך‭ ‬לפני‭ ‬שבוע‭, ‬כשאמר‭ ‬לי‭ ‬הפוסק‭ ‬הגדול‭ ‬וחבר‭ ‬מועצת‭ ‬גדולי‭ ‬התורה‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬יצחק‭ ‬זילברשטיין‭, ‬שאין‭ ‬דרגה‭ ‬תורנית‭ ‬הדומה‭ ‬לדרגת‭ ‬גדולי‭ ‬התורה‭ ‬שבירושלים‭. ‬מעלת‭ ‬הקדושה‭ ‬הירושלמית‭ ‬מייחדת‭ ‬אותם‭ ‬בדרגה‭ ‬גבוהה‭ ‬מזו‭ ‬של‭ ‬תלמידי‭ ‬החכמים‭ ‬שלא‭ ‬זכו‭ ‬לחיות‭ ‬בירושלים‭, ‬אמר‭ ‬בענוותנותו‭. ‬את‭ ‬הדברים‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬אמר‭ ‬לא‭ ‬כרעיון‭ ‬מופשט‭, ‬אלא‭ ‬בתוך‭ ‬שיחה‭ ‬על‭ ‬ייחודיותם‭ ‬של‭ ‬הגרש״ז‭ ‬אויערבך‭, ‬חתנו‭ ‬ותלמידו‭ ‬מו״ר‭ ‬הגרז״ן‭ ‬גולדברג‭, ‬ויבלח״א‭ ‬תלמיד‭ ‬הגרש״ז‭ ‬מורנו‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬אביגדר‭ ‬הלוי‭ ‬נבנצל‭. [‬אגב‭, ‬מאור‭ ‬הפנים‭ ‬הידוע‭ ‬של‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬זילברשטיין‭, ‬החיוך‭ ‬שלא‭ ‬מש‭ ‬מפניו‭ ‬כלפי‭ ‬כל‭ ‬אדם‭, ‬הוא‭ ‬בוודאי‭ ‬ירושלמי‭…]. ‬אכן‭ ‬״כי‭ ‬מציון‭ ‬תצא‭ ‬תורה‭ ‬ודבר‭ ‬ה׳‭ ‬מירושלים״‭. ‬

השבוע‭ ‬נפטר‭ ‬רבה‭ ‬של‭ ‬גבעתיים‭, ‬הרב‭ ‬יוסף‭ ‬גליקסברג‭, ‬ניצול‭ ‬שואה‭ ‬מ״ילדי‭ ‬טהרן״‭, ‬תלמידו‭ ‬ובן‭ ‬טיפוחיו‭ ‬של‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬מפוניבז׳‭, ‬יו״ר‭ ‬חבר‭ ‬הרבנים‭ ‬של‭ ‬הפועל‭ ‬המזרחי‭ ‬וחבר‭ ‬מועצת‭ ‬הרבנות‭ ‬הראשית‭. ‬ביקרתי‭ ‬אצלו‭ ‬לאחרונה‭ ‬עם‭ ‬שניים‭ ‬מבניי‭, ‬להתברך‭ ‬מפיו‭ ‬לקראת‭ ‬תחילת‭ ‬זמן‭ ‬אלול‭ ‬בישיבות‭. ‬בצאתנו‭ ‬שאלנו‭ ‬אותו‭: ‬״מהי‭ ‬העצה‭ ‬הטובה‭ ‬ביותר‭ ‬להצלחה‭ ‬עבורם‭ ‬בישיבה‭?‬״‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬השיב‭ ‬תשובה‭ ‬מעניינת‭: ‬״למצוא‭ ‬חברותא‭ ‬עם‭ ‬יראת‭ ‬שמים״‭. [‬בדרך‭ ‬כלל‭ ‬מחפשים‭ ‬חברותא‭ ‬למדן‭. ‬מ‭.‬ד‭.] ‬״מי‭ ‬היה‭ ‬החברותא‭ ‬של‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬בישיבת‭ ‬פוניבז׳‭?‬״‭ ‬שאלתיו‭ ‬לאזני‭ ‬הילדים‭. ‬והוא‭ ‬השיב‭, ‬כנאה‭ ‬דורש‭ ‬ונאה‭ ‬מקיים‭: ‬״הרב‭ ‬זלמן‭ ‬נחמיה‭ ‬גולדברג״‭… ‬■

ר' מאיר דורפמן 

Understanding Criticism

Criticism is a universal—but painful—experience. Being criticized may trigger fear, shame, or anger, and feed into your insecurities about being unworthy or incompetent. Winston Churchill likened criticism to pain in the human body—an unpleasant experience that is necessary for growth and learning. He also stated that being criticized is good because it meant you have stood up for something.

Criticism can be a way of asserting power and social control, or of neutralizing competition, but it can also be a way of communicating a genuine grievance or speaking up for oneself, even if unskillfully. Not all experiences and situations are the same, and becoming emotionally intelligent means understanding the subtler nuances and context so you can respond mindfully and skillfully.

Below are 30 possible reasons why a friend, partner, colleague, relative or acquaintance may criticize you:

They are threatened by your competence, attractiveness, etc. so they are trying to level the playing field.

They have a concern about your motivation, skill level, performance or contribution.

They feel you are not doing your share of the work or being a team player.

They have a strong unmet need that is not being satisfied.

They have a controlling personality and have to be in charge.

They feel entitled to special treatment or status and do not feel they are receiving it.

They want to make you look bad so as to advance their own position or curry favor with the bosses, etc.

They feel insecure and are overcompensating.

They think you are making them look bad in front of others.

They feel criticized by you and are counter-attacking.

They think they are genuinely helping you by giving you the benefit of their wisdom or experience.

They have strong opinions on a subject (e.g., politics, religion etc.) and see other points of view as less valid.

They are trying to get your attention or connect with you but lack skills, so they end up whining (e.g., kids, teenagers).

They are testing limits in order to feel more independent (teenagers, young adults).

They are competing with you for status or position, or you are an obstacle to their goal.

They see themselves as an expert on the topic by virtue of education or experience and they want to share their knowledge with you and be admired.

They are frustrated with you because they don’t feel you have been hearing them or responding to their requests.

They are trying to put their own spin on a situation to make them look good or minimize their bad behavior.

They are setting limits on your disrespectful/inconsiderate behavior.

They want you to understand how your actions are hurting or disadvantaging them.

They are trying to bully or intimidate you so they can feel powerful.

They are defending their own actions by pointing out that you also did some things wrong.

They lack social skills and are delivering well-meant feedback unskillfully.

They want to feel important and respected (e.g., an elderly family member).

They are covering up hurt feelings with anger.

They are a narcissist and can’t handle your confronting them or not going along with them.

They have a problem they don’t want to deal with (e.g., substance abuse, spending money) and are trying to get you to back off.

They feel you are acting unfairly or taking advantage.

They have different values and perspectives than you and are judging you.

They are trying to shame or humiliate you, perhaps as revenge or a power play.

Understanding The Critic's Motivations

The majority of the reasons listed above have to do with the critic’s own agenda or perspective, but some may be the result of your behavior, or of an unskillful attempt to connect with you. When partners or spouses criticize each other, there are often softer feelings underneath, such as feeling hurt, rejected, or not important. It is best to try to understand the critic's agenda before responding so you can tailor your response to best meet the situation.

These are some important questions to ask yourself so you can be more mindful and strategic in your response:

Does this person seem to be coming from a genuine place?

Is any part of their criticism legitimate? What was your contribution?

Are they trying to be helpful?

Is the criticism public or private? If public, why did they choose that forum?

Does the criticizer seem to be competing with you for status, position, or inclusion?

Are there hurt feelings underneath? Notice the person’s body language, tone of voice, etc.

Who is the intended audience? You or somebody else?

Is the criticizer really interested in solving a problem or reaching a mutual understanding?

Are they willing to listen to you?

Are they capable of moving off of their position to reach a compromise?

Is this just a difference of opinion or something more personal?

Are they just venting or do they want you to try to fix things?

Do they perceive you inaccurately? Are they projecting qualities or intentions onto you that are more about their own issues?

Is this only about them? Are they respecting your right to have a different opinion or make an independent choice?

How To Respond to Criticism

The answers to the above questions will determine your response. If the person seems to be a narcissist, dirty competitor, or bully, you will want to set some kind of limit or boundary on how they can talk to or about you. In a public forum, such as a meeting, you will want to defend your performance, argue for the value of your decision or work, and correct any misperceptions.

Restating your genuine good intentions or motivations—and taking responsibility for your share of the issue—is a good strategy in many situations. If the complainer is a partner, child, friend, or family member, you may want to let them know that you care about them and genuinely want to understand their concerns and perspective, even if you don't always agree. In some situations, you may want to indulge the person’s underlying need by telling them that you respect their opinions or appreciate their efforts. Depending on the situation, you may want to assert your independence or right to have a different opinion—"Let’s agree to disagree." With a whining toddler or teenager, a good strategy is to acknowledge that their feeling or need is legitimate but that they need to work on the delivery so it’s more respectful. You may set a limit, try to find a compromise, or let them know what choices are available. Putting yourself in the other person’s shoes can make you feel more patient and empathic. If the criticism is legitimate, you may want to take corrective action.

Common Traps to Avoid

In dealing with criticism, your goal will likely be one of the following:

to reach a mutually acceptable resolution

to respectfully set a limit and defend yourself if appropriate

to correct any misperceptions or misrepresentations

to gain a better understanding of why this person is upset with you or disagrees

Unfortunately, because criticism triggers your “fight-flight-or-freeze” response, your first reaction will most likely be to feel blindsided; to run away and avoid the conflict; to try to prove you are right without listening to the other person; or to counter-attack. None of these responses are particularly effective. Some will make the critic angrier or leave you defenseless. So when confronted with criticism, take a mindful moment or two to take a deep breath, notice how you feel and what the other person is communicating nonverbally, and refocus on what you want from the situation. Feel free to use delaying tactics such as reflecting what you think the person is saying (“Are you saying that...?”) or saying that you need a minute or two to think about what they’ve said before you respond.

Final Thoughts

Nobody likes to be criticized, but it is part of the human experience. Sometimes, it is just a power play or someone’s projection—but it can also be a valuable piece of information about how you are being perceived. It may be a signal to pay more attention to office politics, to be more thoughtful about picking up after yourself, or to be more attentive to your partner's need for intimacy.

Try to find the middle ground between taking too much responsibility for other people’s issues and being too defensive. Remember to be compassionate to yourself for this (perhaps small) experience of deflation and use your wise mind, rather than your reactive mind, to move forward.

Psych. Today

Are You Tired Of Resentment?

No matter how valid the reasons for it may be, resentment is degenerative; on autopilot, it leads inevitably to contempt, if not disgust. It makes us hyper-vigilant for possible offenses and all but blinds us to ameliorating circumstances. It’s highly contagious; whomever we resent is bound to resent us in return. It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy by stimulating the negative responses we expect and dread.

Once resentment becomes part of our autopilot defense system, it takes determined effort to break its hold. That’s due in part to its obsessional quality—we think about perceived offenses and unfair treatment over and over. The obsessional aspect keeps past offenses ever present; it seems as if they happened not once or twice but a thousand times.

Whether we intend it or not, resentment is inherently devaluing. It makes us hypersensitive to other people’s unfairness while impairing our ability to perceive our own unfairness. While feeling resentful, negotiating about differences is doomed to failure.

Discover and Heal the Hurt

Resentment typically covers up hurt. As long as the hurt remains unhealed, the chains of resentment grow ever tighter. Resentment lasts so long because it functions like ice on a wound: It anesthetizes pain but prevents healing.

Until the chains of resentment are broken, autopilot thoughts must be monitored and regulated. It helps to divide our thinking into three categories: worsening, numbing, healing.

Worsening

Ruminating on all possible reasons for the resented offense

Speculating about the offender’s state of mind

Justifying the resentment—to oneself and to others

Fantasizing about retribution

Demanding compensation

Focusing on things we cannot control or influence.

A hapless way to avoid worsening thoughts is through attempts to numb the resentment, through distractions, workaholism, alcohol, or drugs.

Fortunately, we can train our brains to evoke healing thoughts, through self-compassion, compassion for others, and acting on the natural motivations of hurt and vulnerability to improve, appreciate, connect, or protect.

When we catch ourselves in worsening strains of thoughts or attempting to numb resentful ideation, we must try to engage thoughts that heal.

Self-Compassion

Self-compassion is sympathy for our hurt. It differs from self-pity in that it carries motivations to heal, correct, and improve.

To use self-compassion to heal hidden hurt, we must identify the hurt or vulnerability beneath the resentment. Here’s the formula:

“I feel resentment. What might I also feel guilty about, ashamed of, afraid of, or sad about?”

If guilt lurks beneath resentment, I’ve violated some value. To heal the guilt, I must reaffirm the violated value and perform compensatory acts—at the very least, an apology.

Shame indicates perceived failure or severed connection from a loved one. To heal it, I must redouble efforts to succeed and reconnect to loved ones.

Fear commonly augurs a threat of harm. I must make myself and my loved ones safe.

Sadness indicates the loss of a valued person or object. I must fill the void by valuing other people with compassion and kindness, or by valuing animals, objects, or experiences.

Example

I resent my wife for inviting her adult nephew to move in with us. I’m obsessing about how unfair it is. He’s irresponsible and untrustworthy. She took it for granted that I would be okay with this disruption of our household.

What might I also feel guilty about?

Part of me thinks we should help her nephew.

What am I also ashamed of?

I’m being selfish and not compassionate about her sense of obligation to her nephew.

What am I also afraid of?

Losing my wife.

What do I also feel sad about?

Loss of privacy.

I want to improve my experience by taking my wife’s perspective and realizing how important this is to her. Perspective-taking requires effort because resentment impairs our ability to see other perspectives.

I appreciate her many contributions to my life.

I like myself better when I’m connected to her.

I want to protect her from the pain of abandoning her family.

I think I can come up with ways to protect my privacy with her nephew in the house.

My resentment is greatly reduced as we negotiate about the length of her nephew’s stay.

With resentment regulated, we are free to negotiate differences and arrive at solutions that everyone feels okay about, with no one feeling put upon or taken advantage of.

Negotiation works only when the parties want to rid themselves of resentment. Ultimately, it’s a matter of how much we value our well-being, which resentment sorely undermines.

Psych. Today 

שיעור פרשת השבוע תצוה - זכור תשפ"ה עברית I הרב סיני הלברשטאם

Reframing Anger

Anger is one of the most intense and challenging emotions we experience. It can arise from feelings of injustice, frustration, or perceived threats to our well-being. Whether anger manifests in ourselves or in others, it has the potential to create division, escalate conflicts, and harm relationships. However, anger does not have to control us. By utilizing compassion—specifically, compassionate reframing—we can transform anger into an opportunity for deeper understanding, connection, and positive change.

Understanding Anger and Its Origins

At its core, anger is a reaction to an appraisal—a mental assessment of a situation that threatens something we value. This appraisal determines the intensity and quality of our emotional response. However, situations themselves do not inherently contain meaning; we assign meaning to them based on our interpretations. When we react in anger, we often view events through a narrow lens, reinforcing negative emotions and rigid perspectives.

Reframing is the process of consciously changing our interpretation of an event to reduce negative emotions. People who regularly engage in cognitive reappraisal experience lower levels of stress, depression, and anger. Compassionate reframing takes this one step further by integrating compassion—for both ourselves and others—into the way we interpret situations. This technique helps us move away from hostility and resentment and toward a mindset of unity and understanding.

The Role of Compassion in Diffusing Anger

Compassion has the power to neutralize anger by softening our perspective. It allows us to acknowledge suffering—both our own and that of others—without immediate judgment or retaliation. By choosing to see anger as a signal of deeper needs rather than a weapon of destruction, we can shift our reactions from aggressive to constructive.

Consider a common scenario: You are at a restaurant, and the server has not attended to your table for quite some time. A typical reaction might be:

"This is ridiculous! We’ve been waiting forever. The service here is terrible!"

This appraisal is rooted in frustration and a sense of entitlement. It assumes negligence and leads to an angry emotional response.

A simple cognitive reappraisal might be:

"We’ve been waiting for a while, but at least I can enjoy this time with my friends."

This shift in thinking alleviates some frustration, but it does not necessarily foster compassion.

A compassionate reframe might be:

"I don’t like how long this is taking, but I know serving tables is difficult. Maybe they’re short-staffed tonight. At least I can enjoy my time with friends."

This approach acknowledges personal discomfort while also extending understanding to the server. It prevents anger from escalating and creates an opportunity to act with patience and kindness.

Applying Compassionate Reframing to Angry People

When dealing with someone else's anger, compassionate reframing can help us de-escalate conflict and engage with the person in a meaningful way. Rather than reacting defensively or dismissively, we can ask ourselves:

What might be causing their anger?

Are they experiencing stress, fear, or unmet needs?

How can I respond in a way that acknowledges their emotions without fueling hostility?

For example, if a colleague lashes out at you for an oversight, an instinctive reaction might be to defend yourself or argue back. However, a compassionate reframe might be:

"They’re obviously upset, but perhaps this mistake added to their already overwhelming workload. I can acknowledge their frustration without taking their words personally."

This approach maintains personal boundaries while also fostering understanding, reducing the likelihood of an escalating argument.

Case Study: Nathan’s Road Rage

Nathan, one of my clients, struggled with anger, particularly in traffic. One morning, another driver cut him off, nearly causing an accident. His immediate reaction was:

"You idiot! You could’ve killed us both!"

His anger stemmed from a sense of injustice and fear. When he shared this experience in therapy, I guided him through compassionate reframing by encouraging him to consider alternative explanations:

Perhaps the other driver was rushing to a hospital emergency.

Maybe they misjudged the distance due to poor visibility.

Could they have simply made an honest mistake?

Nathan’s reframe became:

"That was a dangerous situation, and I was scared. But I’ll never know why that driver acted that way. I’m grateful I’m safe."

By shifting his perspective, Nathan diffused his own anger and avoided unnecessary stress. Over time, he applied compassionate reframing to other situations in his life, leading to greater emotional resilience.

Practicing Compassionate Reframing

If you struggle with anger—whether within yourself or in dealing with others—try this compassionate reframing exercise:

Identify your initial interpretation of the situation. What story are you telling yourself?

Examine your assumptions. Are they harsh, critical, or one-sided?

Determine which of your core needs (security, esteem, autonomy, integrity) have been triggered.

Consider alternative explanations for the situation.

Acknowledge your own emotions with kindness rather than self-judgment.

Extend compassion to the other person by recognizing their possible struggles.

Create a new, more compassionate narrative.

After completing this exercise, notice how your emotional state shifts. Do you feel calmer? More open? More in control of your response?

Final Thoughts

Anger is an unavoidable part of life, but it does not have to dominate our reactions or relationships. By practicing compassionate reframing, we gain the ability to step back, assess situations with kindness, and respond in ways that promote peace rather than conflict. Whether in personal interactions, professional settings, or moments of frustration with strangers, compassionate reframing offers a powerful tool for transforming anger into understanding. The choice to reframe our perspective not only benefits our emotional well-being but also fosters a world where compassion leads the way in conflict resolution and human connection.

Psych. Today 

הרב יוסף גליקסבורג זצ"ל

שמעתי‭ ‬מבתו‭ ‬של‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬יוסף‭ ‬גליקסברג‭, ‬גב׳‭ ‬פינקל‭, ‬שכשהגיעה‭ ‬הקבוצה‭ ‬של‭ ‬״ילדי‭ ‬טהרן״‭ ‬לארץ‭, ‬אמרה‭ ‬לו‭ ‬אשת‭ ‬עליית‭ ‬הנוער‭, ‬גב׳‭ ‬הנרייטה‭ ‬סולד‭: ‬תבחר‭ ‬איזה‭ ‬קיבוץ‭ ‬שתרצה‭, ‬באיזה‭ ‬אזור‭ ‬שתרצה‭, ‬צפון‭, ‬דרום‭, ‬מזרח‭, ‬מערב‭, ‬ונארגן‭ ‬לך‭ ‬שם‭ ‬מקום‭. ‬והוא‭, ‬ילד‭ ‬בן‭ ‬9‭, ‬אומר‭ ‬לה‭ ‬שהוא‭ ‬רק‭ ‬רוצה‭ ‬ללכת‭ ‬לישיבה‭. ‬לא‭ ‬חשוב‭ ‬לו‭ ‬איפה‭, ‬בצפון‭, ‬בדרום‭, ‬במזרח‭, ‬במערב‭, ‬אבל‭ ‬רק‭ ‬ישיבה‭! ‬כך‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬הגיע‭ ‬לישיבת‭ ‬פוניבז׳‭.‬

את‭ ‬ההמשך‭ ‬שמעתי‭ ‬מהרב‭ ‬גליקסברג‭ ‬עצמו‭. ‬כשהגעתי‭ ‬לביתו‭, ‬ראיתי‭ ‬על‭ ‬הקיר‭ ‬שתי‭ ‬תמונות‭ ‬גדולות‭ ‬בלבד‭, ‬אחת‭ ‬של‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬מפוניבז׳‭ (‬הרב‭ ‬כהנמן‭) ‬והשנייה‭ ‬של‭ ‬אביו‭. ‬ביקשתי‭ ‬ממנו‭ ‬הסבר‭ ‬לקשר‭ ‬בין‭ ‬התמונות‭, ‬וכך‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬השיב‭: ‬׳הגענו‭ ‬יחד‭ ‬כמה‭ ‬ילדים‭ ‬מ״ילדי‭ ‬טהרן״‭ ‬לישיבת‭ ‬פוניבז׳‭. ‬כנראה‭ ‬שאני‭ ‬עליתי‭ ‬ראשון‭ ‬במדרגות‭ ‬הישיבה‭. ‬הרב‭ ‬מפוניבז׳‭ ‬יורד‭ ‬במדרגות‭, ‬רואה‭ ‬אותי‭, ‬מחבק‭ ‬אותי‭ ‬חיבוק‭ ‬ענק‭, ‬מנשק‭, ‬בוכה‭ ‬מהתרגשות‭. ‬זו‭ ‬הייתה‭ ‬רק‭ ‬פתיחה‭ ‬לבאות‭. ‬הוא‭ ‬באמת‭ ‬היה‭ ‬כמו‭ ‬אבא‭ ‬לתלמידיו‭. ‬הקשר‭ ‬הזה‭ ‬היה‭ ‬כך‭ ‬עד‭ ‬סוף‭ ‬ימיו‭, ‬אהבה‭ ‬עם‭ ‬הבעה‭ ‬רגשית‭ ‬עוצמתית‭, ‬עידוד‭, ‬אמון‭ ‬בתלמידים‭. ‬הוא‭ ‬פיתח‭ ‬אותי‭, ‬נתן‭ ‬לי‭ ‬כוח‭. ‬אתו‭ ‬התייעצתי‭ ‬גם‭ ‬מאוחר‭ ‬יותר‭, ‬לפני‭ ‬קבלת‭ ‬תפקיד‭ ‬הרבנות‭, ‬והוא‭ ‬זה‭ ‬שהפיג‭ ‬את‭ ‬חששותיי׳‭. ‬5‭ ‬שנים‭ ‬אחרי‭ ‬פטירת‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬מפוניבז׳‭ ‬כתב‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬גליקסברג‭ ‬יצירה‭ ‬גדולה‭ ‬ומופלאה‭ ‬על‭ ‬דמותו‭, ‬שהתפרסמה‭ ‬בעיתון‭ ‬״הצופה״‭, ‬ולענ״ד‭ ‬סיפוריה‭ ‬ראויים‭ ‬לשמש‭ ‬כמדריך‭ ‬למחנך‭, ‬ביעילות‭ ‬גדולה‭ ‬יותר‭ ‬ממחקרים‭ ‬דידקטיים‭ ‬שיטתיים‭.‬

מעניין‭ ‬לעניין‭, ‬אביא‭ ‬כאן‭ ‬דברים‭ ‬שסיפר‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬דוד‭ ‬פוקס‭. ‬לראשונה‭ ‬קראתי‭ ‬על‭ ‬ר׳‭ ‬דוד‭ ‬בילדותי‭, ‬בספר‭ ‬שיצא‭ ‬לזכר‭ ‬בנימין‭ ‬גל‭ ‬הי״ד‭, ‬תלמיד‭ ‬ישיבת‭ ‬הר‭ ‬עציון‭ ‬ובוגר‭ ‬״נתיב‭ ‬מאיר״‭, ‬שנפל‭ ‬בתעלה‭ ‬במלחמת‭ ‬יום‭ ‬הכיפורים‭, ‬ועשה‭ ‬עלי‭ ‬רושם‭ ‬רב‭. ‬בני‭ ‬גל‭ ‬מתבטא‭ ‬שם‭ ‬בהערצה‭ ‬גדולה‭ ‬על‭ ‬רבו‭, ‬כמחנך‭ ‬אגדי‭. ‬עם‭ ‬השנים‭ ‬פגשתי‭ ‬הערצה‭ ‬זו‭ ‬אצל‭ ‬עוד‭ ‬רבים‭ ‬מתלמידיו‭, ‬ובערוב‭ ‬ימיו‭ ‬זכיתי‭ ‬לפוגשו‭ ‬פגישה‭ ‬ארוכה‭ ‬ומפעימה‭, ‬שאולי‭ ‬אביא‭ ‬ממנה‭ ‬בעתיד‭. ‬סיפור‭ ‬זה‭ ‬ראיתי‭ ‬בספר‭ ‬״לנטוע‭ ‬שמים״‭, ‬שערכו‭ ‬תלמידיו‭ ‬לכבודו‭.‬

וכך‭ ‬סיפר‭ ‬ר׳‭ ‬דוד‭ ‬מה‭ ‬ששמע‭ ‬מתלמידו‭, ‬שעלה‭ ‬גם‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬עם‭ ‬׳עליית‭ ‬הנוער׳‭, ‬ולמד‭ ‬בישיבת‭ ‬פוניבז׳‭: ‬״כשהיה‭ ‬בן‭ ‬שלוש‭ ‬עשרה‭ ‬שכב‭ ‬בפנימייה‭ ‬בחדר‭ ‬גדול‭ ‬עם‭ ‬עוד‭ ‬ארבעים‭ ‬בחורים‭, ‬עשרים‭ ‬מיטות‭ ‬בכל‭ ‬צד‭. ‬לילה‭ ‬אחד‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬התעורר‭ ‬מרעש‭ ‬שהפחיד‭ ‬אותו‭. ‬בחשכה‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬זיהה‭ ‬דמות‭ ‬פוסעת‭ ‬בין‭ ‬המיטות‭. ‬הרב‭ ‬כהנמן‭ ‬ראה‭ ‬שהוא‭ ‬התעורר‭, ‬וניגש‭ ‬אליו‭. ‬התיישב‭ ‬על‭ ‬מיטתו‭, ‬ושאל‭ ‬אותו‭: ‬״מה‭ ‬קרה‭? ‬למה‭ ‬התעוררת‭?‬״‭ ‬הבחור‭ ‬סיפר‭ ‬ששמע‭ ‬רעש‭ ‬שהפחיד‭ ‬אותו‭, ‬והרב‭ ‬כהנמן‭ ‬הרגיע‭ ‬אותו‭ ‬וישב‭ ‬לידו‭ ‬עד‭ ‬שנרדם‭. ‬״לפני‭ ‬שאני‭ ‬נוסע‭ ‬לחו״ל״‭, ‬סיפר‭ ‬לו‭, ‬״אני‭ ‬נפרד‭ ‬מהילדים‭ ‬בישיבה״‭. ‬מהילדים‭, ‬לא‭ ‬מהר״מים‭, ‬לא‭ ‬מחברי‭ ‬ה׳כולל׳‭, ‬אלא‭ ‬מהילדים‭ ‬הלומדים‭ ‬בישיבה‭. ‬״מכיוון‭ ‬ש‭(‬הפעם‭) ‬אני‭ ‬יוצא‭ ‬לפני‭ ‬תפילת‭ ‬שחרית‭, ‬ולא‭ ‬אוכל‭ ‬להגיד‭ ‬שלום‭, ‬אני‭ ‬עובר‭ ‬כאן‭ ‬ממיטה‭ ‬למיטה‭, ‬ונותן‭ ‬לכל‭ ‬ילד‭ ‬נשיקה‭ ‬על‭ ‬המצח״‭. ‬״כל‭ ‬שיחת‭ ‬מוסר‭ ‬ששמעתי‭, ‬כל‭ ‬שיעור‭ ‬שלמדתי‭, ‬לא‭ ‬השפיעו‭ ‬עליי‭ ‬כמו‭ ‬אותה‭ ‬נשיקה‭ ‬במצח‭ ‬שקיבלתי‭ ‬מהרב‭ ‬כהנמן״‭.‬

באוהל‭ ‬השבעה‭ ‬על‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬גליקסברג‭ ‬יכולת‭ ‬לראות‭ ‬את‭ ‬כל‭ ‬קשת‭ ‬גווני‭ ‬החברה‭ ‬הישראלית‭, ‬ואפילו‭ ‬רק‭ ‬על‭ ‬אובדן‭ ‬כוחה‭ ‬של‭ ‬אחדות‭ ‬זו‭ ‬יש‭ ‬לבכות‭. ‬רק‭ ‬דקות‭ ‬מעטות‭ ‬יכולתי‭ ‬לשהות‭ ‬שם‭, ‬הטיתי‭ ‬אוזן‭, ‬והנה‭ ‬כמה‭ ‬דברים‭ ‬אקראיים‭ ‬ששמעתי‭:‬

בנו‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬איתיאל‭: ‬׳כשהתחלתי‭ ‬לכהן‭ ‬כרב‭, ‬אבא‭ ‬אמר‭ ‬לי‭ ‬שרב‭ ‬חייב‭ ‬ללמוד‭ ‬את‭ ‬ההיסטוריה‭ ‬של‭ ‬הקהילה‭, ‬ולדעת‭ ‬לפחות‭ ‬50‭ ‬שנה‭ ‬אחורה‭. ‬הרי‭ ‬יש‭ ‬אנשים‭ ‬בקהילה‭ ‬שהחוויות‭ ‬מאז‭ ‬עדיין‭ ‬משמעותיות‭ ‬להם‭, ‬ואתה‭ ‬חייב‭ ‬להבין‭ ‬מה‭ ‬הם‭ ‬מרגישים‭, ‬מה‭ ‬הם‭ ‬עברו‭ ‬עם‭ ‬הקהילה׳‭. ‬

הרבנית‭ ‬ד״ר‭ ‬איילה‭: ‬׳הגיעה‭ ‬פעם‭ ‬אישה‭ ‬עם‭ ‬עוף‭ ‬אל‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬לשאול‭ ‬על‭ ‬כשרותו‭. ‬הרב‭ ‬עיין‭ ‬והכשיר‭ ‬את‭ ‬העוף‭. ‬בננו‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬אפרים‭ ‬היה‭ ‬אז‭ ‬בן‭ ‬20‭, ‬בדיוק‭ ‬למד‭ ‬סוגיות‭ ‬אלה‭ ‬בלימודי‭ ‬הרבנות‭. ‬הוא‭ ‬ראה‭ ‬את‭ ‬העוף‭, ‬ושאל‭ ‬בתמיהה‭ ‬גדולה‭: ‬אבא‭, ‬הרי‭ ‬ע״פ‭ ‬שיטה‭ ‬פלונית‭ ‬אי‭ ‬אפשר‭ ‬להתיר‭ ‬עוף‭ ‬כזה‭, ‬וכן‭ ‬ע״פ‭ ‬שיטה‭ ‬אלמונית‭ ‬העוף‭ ‬לא‭ ‬כשר‭! ‬הרב‭ ‬השיב‭ ‬לו‭: ‬הבעיה‭ ‬ניכרת‭ ‬בעוף‭, ‬ובגללה‭ ‬האישה‭ ‬הגיעה‭ ‬לשאול‭. ‬עצם‭ ‬העובדה‭ ‬שאשה‭ ‬באה‭ ‬עם‭ ‬העוף‭ ‬לשאול‭, ‬היא‭ ‬כבר‭ ‬עדות‭ ‬לכך‭ ‬שיש‭ ‬לה‭ ‬קושי‭, ‬וזה‭ ‬כבר‭ ‬מגדיר‭ ‬את‭ ‬הדבר‭ ‬כשעת‭ ‬הדחק‭, ‬שבה‭ ‬יש‭ ‬לסמוך‭ ‬על‭ ‬שיטות‭ ‬הפוסקים‭ ‬המקילות׳‭.‬

ע‭.‬ג‭: ‬׳זכורני‭ ‬שבעשרה‭ ‬בטבת‭ ‬פנה‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬לקהל‭ ‬המתפללים‭ ‬ואמר‭: ‬כעת‭ ‬יגידו‭ ‬כולם‭ ‬קדיש‭. ‬שאלתי‭ ‬אותו‭: ‬גם‭ ‬אני‭ ? ‬הורי‭ ‬חיים‭ ‬לאי״ט‭. ‬הוא‭ ‬אמר‭: ‬מי‭ ‬שהוריו‭ ‬חיים‭ ‬אינו‭ ‬חייב‭ ‬לומר‭, ‬אבל‭ ‬כל‭ ‬השאר‭ – ‬כן‭. ‬זוהי‭ ‬תקנת‭ ‬הרבנות‭ ‬הראשית‭ ‬ליום‭ ‬הקדיש‭ ‬הכללי‭, ‬והיא‭ ‬מחייבת‭. ‬כך‭ ‬הוא‭ ‬התייחס‭ ‬לרבנות‭ ‬הראשית‭, ‬גם‭ ‬הרבה‭ ‬אחרי‭ ‬שעומעם‭ ‬זוהרה‭ ‬בעיני‭ ‬הציבור׳‭. ‬

גב׳‭ ‬א‭.‬ק‭: ‬׳הייתי‭ ‬ילדה‭ ‬כאשר‭ ‬הכרתי‭ ‬לראשונה‭ ‬את‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬והרבנית‭ ‬תבלח״א‭. ‬הייתי‭ ‬בתנועת‭ ‬נוער‭ ‬שנקראת‭ ‬״נוער‭ ‬לנוער״‭. ‬בית‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬היה‭ ‬לנו‭ ‬בית‭ ‬שני‭, ‬והוא‭ ‬היה‭ ‬פתוח‭ ‬עבורנו‭ ‬לרווחה‭ ‬תמיד‭, ‬עם‭ ‬האווירה‭ ‬הכי‭ ‬מזמינה‭ ‬שיש‭. ‬שיחות‭, ‬שאלות‭, ‬אווירה‭ ‬ביתית‭, ‬כיבוד‭. ‬זה‭ ‬השפיע‭ ‬על‭ ‬כולנו‭. ‬פעם‭ ‬הראיתי‭ ‬להם‭ ‬תמונה‭ ‬שצולמה‭ ‬בשבת‭, ‬ואני‭ ‬בתוכה‭. ‬אני‭ ‬זוכרת‭ ‬את‭ ‬הרבנית‭ ‬לא‭ ‬אומרת‭ ‬דבר‭, ‬אלא‭ ‬רק‭ ‬מברכת‭ ‬אותי‭, ‬שאזכה‭ ‬לשמור‭ ‬שבת‭. ‬כמובן‭ ‬שבסוף‭ ‬התהליך‭ ‬כך‭ ‬היה׳‭. ‬

ש‭.‬א‭: ‬׳בכל‭ ‬שנה‭ ‬הרב‭ ‬עבר‭ ‬לפני‭ ‬התיבה‭ ‬בתפילת‭ ‬נעילה‭. ‬רבים‭ ‬התקבצו‭ ‬לתפילה‭ ‬זו‭, ‬גם‭ ‬אלה‭ ‬שלא‭ ‬נראו‭ ‬אף‭ ‬פעם‭ ‬בבית‭ ‬הכנסת‭. ‬משנה‭ ‬לשנה‭ ‬התרבו‭ ‬הבאים‭, ‬עד‭ ‬שבבית‭ ‬הכנסת‭ ‬לא‭ ‬היה‭ ‬די‭ ‬מקום‭, ‬ורבים‭ ‬צבאו‭ ‬על‭ ‬בית‭ ‬הכנסת‭ ‬מבחוץ‭. ‬קולו‭ ‬הערב‭ ‬והעוצמתי‭ ‬נשמע‭ ‬גם‭ ‬שם‭. ‬תפילתו‭ ‬הייתה‭ ‬בהתלהבות‭ ‬רבה‭, ‬ותישאר‭ ‬בזיכרון‭ ‬כל‭ ‬מי‭ ‬שהיה‭ ‬שם‭ ‬כל‭ ‬ימיו‭. ‬במוצאי‭ ‬הצום‭ ‬‮–‬‭ ‬״מחיל‭ ‬אל‭ ‬חיל״‭, ‬מתפילה‭ ‬לחסד‭. ‬הבית‭ ‬נפתח‭ ‬לאורחים‭ ‬לשבור‭ ‬את‭ ‬הצום‭ ‬בסעודה׳‭.