Imagine the brain, that shiny bundle of being, securely housed in a protective skull, hosting conscious thoughts in a pool of subconsciousness. The basic brain ingredients are fat, water, protein, carbohydrates, and salt. Described in this way, the brain sounds like it could be whipped up in a kitchen! However, the brain is unfathomably complex, with the capacity to compute faster than any microprocessor. Our brain is a thought generator, informing ourselves not only about ourselves but also about how we relate to the physical world.
Our thoughts pervade most of our waking consciousness. We tell ourselves a story about what is happening, typically narrated by the sound of our own voice. We think our thoughts are factual. We believe that our perceptions of right and wrong are a shared reality. However, our brains are hardwired to see the world within limitations. We are hardwired to detect patterns, to see in perspective, and we experience only a fraction of the sound and color that exist in nature. Our brains are designed to be deeply connected in rich emotional ways with other humans. Our brains become rewired in the midst of traumatic experiences. Our memories are impermanent and are constantly changing.
Our mind is the voice we hear discussing ourselves, and we can learn to manage thoughts that the brain incessantly generates. In this blog post, we will explore the fascinating dynamics of human influence and how it creates a ripple effect that spreads far beyond our immediate interactions. Therefore, managing your thoughts will have a direct impact on improving the human condition.
My career in psychotherapy has allowed me to listen to the thoughts of thousands of humans. In therapy, clients are encouraged to communicate thought patterns that may have been locked in secrecy. The process of communicating internal content can become cathartic, leading to a feeling of goodness from the act of sharing difficult emotional content. Therapists teach new cognitive skills that may improve the thought quality. For example, it is common to have a patient suffering from anxiety in therapy. In a therapeutic setting, patients can train their minds to replace worried thoughts with confident statements. “When I notice that I am thinking about the future and convincing myself that bad events will occur, I can remind myself that I have come through difficult times before or maybe everything will work out fine.”
When we master these kinds of cognitive skills, our joy and happiness predictably increase.
Not only can we impact the quality of our own thoughts but, because we are connected to other human beings who are affected by us, we can impact the people around us as well. This might be through positive reinforcement, support, inspiration, or from the negative effect of interpersonal conflict. Essentially, every interaction with another person has the potential of creating a ripple effect that can have enormous long-term consequences. As you develop the habit of monitoring your thoughts, pay attention to your impact on others.
“Emotional Contagion” is a term used to communicate our impact on each other; however, the term contagion is used to describe pathogens, creating a negative bias. I prefer “Emotional Transfer” to describe our impact on each other. To understand the power of emotional transfer, you can consider the survival advantage of the interactional circuitry between humans. Sharing group emotions can increase the communication of danger that leads to survival. Hence, our reliance upon information transmitted through worry about a possible threat is common to all social animals: packs, herds, prides, and, in the case of humans, families or other organizational structures. When one member of a group becomes aggressive, frightened, or interested, the others will incorporate the emotion. Our behavior influences how others around us experience their world.
Emotions have “negative bias” which causes our brains to prioritize processing ones that skew to what is wrong. This creates hypervigilance where we are on guard for any perceptions of threat. The bias toward possible dangers overshadows the part of our brain that apprehends the beauty of our environment. Negative bias is why loss causes pain disproportionately to the joy of equivalent gain. You will forget most of the meals you have eaten, but you will remember a night that you went unfed. A large monetary bonus will be very pleasant for a short time, but losing a large sum of money can negatively impact someone's mood for months. Having a baby brings short-lived beatific emotions, while losing a child will entail a lifetime of sorrow.
However, positive emotions are more important to long-term well-being compared to the protective factor of worry. Our thoughts affect our feelings and the way we feel influences our behavior. This is a fundamental principle of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. When we pay attention to the thoughts we host, we guide our language to have the best chance at relational success by promoting our best thinking, which, in turn, impacts others.
Humans are inherently social beings, constantly interacting and shaping their understanding of the world. Spoken or written words have a profound impact on those we come into contact with. Our emotions transfer to others which highlights the importance of making efforts to be a positive influence on our family, friends, and coworkers. These interactions have the potential to inspire, motivate, and transform individuals, making social influence an essential aspect of our power.
One of the primary ways in which people influence each other is through verbal or digital communication. Our feedback to others and the way that we treat them shapes their reactions to our influence. What you bring to communication starts a chain of events that impacts your own personal satisfaction, which is typically related to the quality of close relationships.
Deep reflection on our impact on others may lead to a habit of proofreading texts or emails before we send messages. Predicting the impact a communication will have on a reader is part of a successful transmission of digital content. Those who make a positive impact in their communities understand the power of relationships and the importance of building healthy connections. Taking a moment to think about your part in establishing healthy communication is an effective way to achieve your goal of making an extraordinary impact on others. Individuals who develop ways to collaborate in a positive manner have more success in establishing healthy connected relationships. This habit may transform your own thoughts on your ability to steer your future toward security and wellness. Your creation of healthy thoughts will develop into solid relationships that respect the impact of interpersonal communication, and this is a dynamic that I believe is worth constructing and sharing.
Jody Eyre
