Reflections On Our Mortality - And Immortality [With A Bit About Immorality]

לזכות אהובי רבי ברוך בן משה לברכה והצלחה בכל מעשה ידיו
ולרפואת אברהם זלמן בן ברכה בתוך שח"י

Last night the son of a friend tragically died, leaving a young wife, numerous children and little to no money. I am not collecting for the family - my experience has been that it is no simple task to get people to contribute, even to widows and orphans. I have numerous friends with millions upon millions of dollars but even getting 18 dollars is, for me, a Herculean task. That has been my experience after over 20 years of being a gabbai tzdaka. I am sure that others have much more success than I do and hope to learn their secret. I find that it is specifically the poor who are more likely to give than the wealthy. Nu - I must assume that everybody gives at least 10-20 percent of their earnings and I just get to them too late. Am Yisrael is holy. No question about it.

I would like to give the widow and orphans what I have but I really don't think they want my overdraft, they have their own problems....

So why am I telling you this if not to shnorr a few dollars?

[NOTE: This is MUSSAR. If you are not in the category of אוהב את התוכחות-  One who loves rebuke, one of the 48 ways to acquire Torah and the sina qua non of personal growth, please read no further...:-)]

Because EVERY DAY is the best day to remember that we don't live forever. That means...

1] Tell everybody you can that you love them - tomorrow may chas vi-shalom be too late.

2] Do tshuva today because it may chas vi-shalom be your last. [Full disclosure - I lifted that one right out of the gemara...]

3] Learn a lot of Torah - that is what our neshamos are going to be doing for eternity. The more we learn here the more we will enjoy there. It is best not to learn for olam ha-ba. Or because it is interesting. Or because it adds meaning and structure to your life. Or because it makes you smarter. Or because it makes you deeper. Or to impress people. Or for any other reason other that the fact that when you learn you cleave to Hashem and for that we live. That is called תורה לשמה.

4] Go easy on the Facebook etc. etc. etc. Every second is a gift and if not used well - it is gone forever.

5] Think about forever. This world is very temporal. Don't blow your problems out of proportion. This world is way overrated.

6] Be filled with simcha. זה היום עשה השם - If you know that today is a very special gift from Hashem, then נגילה ונשמחה בו -  You will be so filled with joy. [Rav Avraham Weinfeld ztz"l - he survived the holocaust and understood the value of life...]

7] Invest your money in funds that guarantee HUUUUUGE dividends. That means - give away as much as you can. All you TAKE with you is what you GIVE away. ויקחו לי תרומה - When you GIVE, you are really taking. ויקחו. Whatever you keep - you ultimately lose. And give with simcha. It is a zchus.

8] Think about your eulogies. What are people going to say about you? How do you want to be remembered? "Phil 'Pinchas' Tyvehstein, oyyyy, he was such a big Phillies fan. Like, he never, missed a pitch, much less a game. He was mamesh mamesh moiser nefesh to attend every home game in person. And gambling. Boy did he love Vegas. And you shoulda seen the guy eat. He could down four steaks - no problem. And drink. It took a whole bottle and a half of bourbon to even get him tipsy. And at work he was an animal. He would do anything - legal or illegal, moral or immoral to earn a buck. But he loved money and that was his passion [unless the Phillies were playing]. He will be happily missed by his long suffering ex-wife and estranged children. His mistress will now say Kaddish."

We all have a little Phil Tyvehstein in us. OK - maybe you don't but I do. [Watching a movie that features prutzos  - as most do - is halachically compared to taking a mistress. Same category of prohibition. Ignoring one's children when they need you because of other "responsibilities" also is a form of estrangement. Lying or cheating in any way is immoral. Who never lies or "cuts corners" in business? "It's the government, why should I give them my hard earned money." והדברים ידועים].

9] Be bi-simcha because a mitzva done with simcha can't be compared to a mitzva done without.

10] Be bi-simcha even though you heard about a tragedy. It came from a Loving G-d.

11] Think about how his widows and orphans feel. Step out of your small world of self-interests and enter the world of another human being. It is to the soul like a good diet and exercise are for the body. The healthiest.

12] Add you own ideas to the list...