Shaalooom sweeetest friends!!
I usually like to share simchas. I had planned to make a siyum today with everyone via email on the yahrtzeit of a dear friend and have everyone join me in my simcha. But I had SOME DAY so my plans changed. I will share some of the details. [You are all invited to the siyum on a future email bli neder. Bring your cookies and cakes to the email and eat as you read.]
It started like every other day. A meeting with the Boss, my dear Father [called by the Talmud " Shachris"]. Then - a trip to the local pool [called by the Orthodox "mikva"]. Afterwards - morning seder including a phone chavrusa with my son Shmuli who is in yeshiva in Bnei Brak. A regular day. Then I debated - should I daven mincha in the neighborhood shul or daven later on in Tolna on the way to the Azkara for my beloved friend R' Yoel Weisberg ztz"l whose yahrtzeit is today. I decided to daven in Tolna. When I arrived later in the day at about 7pm, I froze in my tracks.
Big signs were hanging everywhere telling that the Rebbe Shlita's mother had passed away and that the funeral was at 5. It was so sad to see. Just recently I had visited her in the hospital. My wife went to give birth but it was a "fake-out-break-out" and little Adina'le wasn't ready to make her grand entrance. It turns out that Hashem sent us there because while there we found out that the Rebbe Shlita's mother was there so I interrupted my habit of reading all the plaques and seeing how many people I know [quite a few. I learned that one need not be rich to know lots of rich people:-)] and went with my wife to visit.
Back to our story.... It was too late to attend the funeral so I waited for everyone to get back. A few minutes later people started approaching me and telling me that the Rebbe Shlita noticed that I was absent at the funeral, obviously meaning that I didn't know about it. He was concerned that I should be informed because I attend his gemara shiur every monday night and I shouldn't come and find out that it was cancelled. That is what he was worrying about on the way home from his mother's funeral. That Elchonon Ehrman shouldn't needlessly come to his shiur. That fit in well with the drasha he had given last night about the jail so many of us find ourselves in. The jail of ...egotism. He emphasized that we must free ourselves because it is a horrible fate to be self-centered.
The Rebbe entered the beis medrash and sat down with his father and brothers. I approached him and he said "I was just talking about you..." I explained that I was on my way to an Azkarah and just stopped there for mincha when I found out the sad news.
Then the shiva began. Not a normal shiva. The Rebbe believes that one must always be happy. Even an aveil. So he was filled with simcha. He was making jokes, giving out l'chaim's and trying to add a spirit of simcha to the room. He said that at his late sister's funeral [she died a young mother of three of cancer] they sang Aishes Chayil. So he said "We are now going to sing eishes chayil". And sing everybody did. It wasn't somber. It was ... simcha-dik. Everything that happens is for the best and even the bracha of Baruch Dayan Emes must be said bi-simcha, so of course we will be bi-simcha.
THAT was a lesson. Not one from a book but one I saw right in front of my eyes. I will never forget it. It was genuine simcha even though of course he loved his mother very much.
A little about her.
Rebbetzin Gittel Weinberg ע"ה was the daughter of The Tolna Rebbe ztz"l, Rav Yochanan Twerski. The Rebbe had a kehilla in Montreal and was very successful. His only daughter grew up in relative wealth and prosperity. In 1949 she went with her new husband to Eretz Yisrael. At the time, this meant living in abject poverty. Sleeping on the floor on a bug infested mattress as thick as a sponge, having barely anything to eat etc. etc. [Bread and jam for breakfast and dinner, vegetable soup for lunch. That's it]. The Rebbe Shlita asked his mother how she did it. She explained simply that she had an ideal - to live in Eretz Yisrael. The horrible material situation was not going to stop her.
When her daughter was ill for a long time and then died, there wasn't a word of complaint. If everything is for the best and from Hashem - what is there to complain about? Just simcha.
After maariv, the Rebbe Shlita left the Beis Medrash where he had been sitting and the first day of shiva was over.
So I went to the bus [I don't like traveling in any vehichle smaller than a stretch limo] and traveled to Baka where the Azkara was taking place. When I arrived [took me a while. "Rechov Asher". Lived in Yerushalyim for 25 years and never heard of it. FYI - it is right off Rechov Naftali.... So biblical. I asked a taxi driver for directions but couldn't find it. I then asked a taxi driver again for directions and he said with annoyance "You already asked me once":-)], I was told that the niftar's son, Yishai, had been wounded in Gaza and then hospitalized but came anyway. When I walked into the shul he was speaking in front of everybody with a huge patch over his eye.
Yishai Weisberg is a married, high ranking army officer with hundreds of troops under his command. You would never know it when you meet him. He is compactly built, soft-spoken, gentle, sweet tempered and filled with emunah. He was talking all about his father's maasim tovim but of course not about his own personal heroism. Afterwards I approached him, we embraced and I asked what the prognosis is for his eye. Will the doctors be able to save it? He laughed good-naturedly, slapped my hand and said "Fifty-fifty".
Laughed? Fifty-fifty if he will ever have two eyes again??
Where does this come from??
Sweetest friends - it comes from the same place where the Rebbe's simcha on the day of his mother's death comes from and the same place where the Rebbetzin decided to move to Eretz Yisrael and sacrifice the comforts of being near her parents and having material comfort to live in a war torn, fledgling State of Israel comes from.
It is called ...Emunah. The belief that life is more than a comfortable bed, a lot of money and the many pleasures this world has to offer. Life is knowing what your purpose it and then fulfilling that purpose. Our external circumstances are never completely in our hands but our resolve to sacrifice everything for what really matters, for something bigger and greater than our own individual selves, IS in our hands.
We live not for self-aggrandizement, not for professional success but to bring more light and kedusha into the world. Tzahal is doing this by attempting to wipe out the forces of evil and darkness. We have already lost many soldiers but we have not lost our spirit and high morale. It is not our war we are fighting but Hashem's.
Hashem tells Moshe to take vengeance for the Jewish People against Midyan - נקום נקמת בני ישראל מאת המדינים. Moshe in turn tells the Jews to take vengeance for Hashem - לתת נקמת השם במדין. It is the same thing. Klal Yisrael bring Hashem's presence into the world and to fight us is to fight Him.
I was on an emotional roller coaster today and wanted to share the lessons with others. Live your lives with Emuna and for others. That Emuna and self-sacrifice will always translate into simcha, regardless of the circumstances. NOTHING bad can happen. Everything is from our loving Father. To be great requires sacrifice, sometimes of life and limb but that doesn't have to lower our morale. The knowledge that we are members of the most special and chosen people on earth and that our entire focus is adding light and removing darkness is enough to fill us with constant joy. As the Rebbe Shlita said today - m'gait nor in de kav fun simcha. We only go with joy. [His eulogy was in Yiddish and I will pass it on to anyone who wants to hear it].
Beloved friends!! PLEASE daven for my beloved friend Yishai Dov Halevi ben Neri bi-soch shear cholei yisrael. He is a beautiful, special person and he sacrificed his well being so that we can have a safe country to live in [or at least visit on Sukkos:-)]. And please try to think of ways to be more giving to others as a merit for your own neshamos and primarily for Klal Yisrael who are in dire need of a ישועה. We should all be zoche soon to see a fulfillment of the pasuk עין בעין יראו בשוב השם ציון. Eye to eye we will see the return of Hashem to Tziyon.
Thank you so much and a gut chodesh to all!
Love,
Me:-)
