Excuses

In the past I have discussed how people are multi-faceted. I am also included in the category of "people" [notwithstanding the fact that in my sports-saturated youth I was encouraged by my elders to "play like an animal". On my good days, I did..] and thus no exception to the rule. On one hand I have a "Reb-Levi-Yitzchak-Mi'berditchev-Rav-Kook-Reb-Shlomo-Carlebach-Hey-Man-I-Love-You-Just-The-Way-You-Are-Let's-Hug-You're-Perfect-Dude-Sooo-Holy-Mamesh-Kodesh-Kodashim" side. I also have a "Kotzker-Brutally-Honest-Highly-Critical-Tell-It-Like-It-Is-Hold-No-Punches-Go-For-The-Jugular" side. With myself I naturally tend towards the latter side. It hurts sometimes, especially since I am literally in my brain. With others I TRY [with varying degrees of success] to allow the lovey-dovey side to come out.

This post is definitely an expression of the latter Kotzker side, so stop reading here if you don't want to get annoyed.

:-)

Once upon a time I was involved in a certain "time bound" mitzva. Some people chose to take part in the mitzva, many others chose to abstain. After the mitzva ended many of the abstainers felt it necessary to come up to me and apologize. Each person had a "sorry" usually accompanied by an excuse. I heard one excuse and then another and then yet another. 156 excuses altogether [I totally-completely-absolutely made up that number but you get my point]. I smiled politely to these people but they didn't know what I was thinking. I was thinking that there aren't really 156 reasons. There is ONE lone reason: It just wasn't important enough to them to be part of this particular mitzva, because if it had been they would have...

How interesting. According to halacha the Kallah doesn't have to show up to her wedding. She can send her friend Racheli to stand in her place and she [not Racheli] is married. This is called in advanced Talmudics "Shlichus" [no relation to Lubavitchers moving to Madagascar or Haiti]. So why does no Kallah ever does this [upon rereading this post I noticed this incorrect sentence. I meant to say "do this". But it reminds me of the way some of the "chevre" in my old town used to speak so I kept it]? Maybe she has a HUGE Art History final the coming week and she just can't give up a whole Sunday for dancing and celebrating because she has to study. That is a valid excuse. Just ask Chagall or Van Gogh! Answer: HER WEDDING IS FAR TO IMPORTANT TO MISS AND SHE WILL DO EVERYTHING IN HER POWER TO MAKE IT.

This can be applied to anything in life. If we decide something is important enough we will never miss it. All we have to do is create our list of priorities and make sure that the higher it is on the list, the less likely we are to miss and make excuses. No frum guy ever misses a tefilla [I hope...]. It is just too important. Nobody ever forgets to look before crossing the street. It is just too important. Nobody EVER dies of starvation because he forgot to eat. We have the ability to make the important things in life as critical as eating.

After 20 years in chinuch and 16 years of parenthood I have had ENOUGH of hearing excuses. They just fall short of the mark. Responsibility means production. No excuses. Determination is the name of the game.

Of course I am not going to change the world but there is ONE FELLOW whom I can stop from making excuses for his spiritual dessication and get him to start being a YID! He is presently wearing my shoes....

Kotzk-Finished!

Reb-Levi-Yitzchak-come-back!!

LOVEEEEE AND BLESSINGGSSS SWEEETEST FRIENDS:-)