Chapter I
And it came to pass in the third year of the reign of Achashverosh, King of Persia, that the King threw a great party. And it was during that party, that the King became intoxicated [normally the king didn't drink but he made an exception for Purim and Simchas Torah] and called for his wife Vashti to come appear naked in front of the guests. Now, Vashti was a liberated woman, and was not at all ashamed to display her body in public ("my body, my choice," she used to say). But she was certainly not going to do so at the behest of a male chauvinist like her husband. So she refused to appear, and the following morning, in addition to a major hangover, Achashverosh had one royal-size colossal sexual harassment suit waiting for him. Public opinion quickly turned against the King, tweets against him were flying around like crazy, he was bashed on CNN [who were originally biased in his favor because he and Ted Turner had been old high school buddies] and he was forced to settle out of court for an undisclosed sum of money. Some sources say that it was for 20 million dollars. The King reportedly said that with his billions - who cares!
Alan Dershowitz defended the King and said that it was unlawful what Vashti had done but vehemently denied any personal wrongdoing connected to his friendship to Jeffrey Epstein. He said it was pure Anti Semitism and that we need more Chutzpah to fight unfounded rumors. He is TOTALLY makpid on Shmiras Einyaim. "I might not keep all 613 commandments but I keep the one's I agree with. I grew up in Boro Park and have nephews who learn in Yeshivas Chevron!!"
CNN interviewed the King [on "Larry King Live"] and he denied the whole thing. He said "FAKE NEWS. I did not ask 'that woman' to appear naked in front of everybody. [An apparent shtuch at Bill Clinton who was unavailable for comment]. I merely wanted her to come and enjoy the party with everyone else. I felt that it was discriminatory that men and women have separate parties. Women are equal citizens and deserve the same rights as men. I wanted her to come and celebrate equality".
Later, a video of the event was leaked by one of Achashveiroshes advisors, proving that Vashti had in fact been called to appear naked. A commission was appointed to find out who leaked the video and if found, he will be fired. Achashveirosh again appeared on CNN and admitted that he had not been "one hundred percent truthful" and had in fact insisted that Vashti appear naked but that was only because he believed that the patriarchal society is oppressing women by insisting that they get dressed. True liberation, insisted Achashveirosh, will only come when women are allowed to be their true selves with having to cover themselves up as if they have something to hide. Dershowitz agreed while maintaining his client's innocence.
He was later interviewed by Fox News where he insisted that the first interview with CNN had been tampered with to make him look bad. "They are a bunch of losers", he insisted. "Fake news. No. Total fake news. They are EVIL PEOPLE. They don't deserve to be in journalism. Lyin' CNN. Low energy people."
He then fired most of his staff.
He then fired most of his staff.
