Overcoming The Destructive Tzeitgeist [Spirit Of The Times]

 From an article by a Rabbi of an MO communiy in the NYC area: 

In a singles community, roommate issues loom very large, and rabbis are often called in to mediate. Sometimes the issues are not specific to Jews—splitting bills or cleaning the apartment—but in the context of this community, they are seeking a specifically Jewish law perspective on how to navigate these issues. And these modern Orthodox communities also have distinct issues: Halachic disputes may arise if one roommate changes observance levels, so roommates sometimes draw up elaborate contracts of accepted behavior and religious standards within the apartment. Roommate ads include elaborate abbreviations, some of which are understandable only to the initiated, such as SS (shomer Shabbat), SK (shomer kashrut), or NBAO (no boys allowed overnight).

WOW! Orthodox Jews need to stipulate with each other that they will be shomer shabbos, kashrus and to NOT HAVE BOYS SLEEP OVER!! 😟😟   If there is a reason to rip kriyah even in Adar - this is it.

The Rabbi further writes: 

An interesting turn of terminology has developed among a segment of this population. I have heard young men—and some women—describe themselves as shomer biah (refraining from sexual intercourse) rather than shomer negiah (refraining from all forms of physical intimacy, even touch, as Halacha requires), or simply not shomer negiah. 

WOW!! Isn't that ODDDDD!! The G-d who doesn't want one in bed with a member of the opposite sex [outside of marriage] - is the same G-d who doesn't allow you to touch [some say מדאורייתא others מדרבנן but for us it doesn't matter. We aren't Karaites]. Yet - that is the terminology - "I am shomer biah" [in the meantime...]. 

So what is the tikkun? 

What I have noticed is that boys who are connected a] to a Rebbi and b] to Talmud Torah, remain strong. Boys who aren't - fall. Big time. [For girls I can't speak but I have had very limited contact with them over the years. Better that way. Rebbetzins for the ladies, Rabbis for the men. Not that I am a Rabbi but I dress like one].

So Mussar Haskel [regardless of where you are holding in life]: Rebbi and Talmud Torah [especially MUSSARRRRR and Gemara Bi-iyun that has a special כוח!!!!]. Those are לענ"ד the building blocks for staying close to the Source and away from the destruction of basic standards of Kedusha that is taking place between our brothers and sisters in certain places.