This dvar Torah was written l'iluy nishmas Avraham Ephraim ben Naftali Tzvi z'l by RACHEL BOLNICK. I thank her for the beautiful contribution.
And may this learning be for the refuah shleima of Shulamis Chaya bas Meytal Teyma and Dan Chaim Ha'Levi ben Esther Rivka- please keep them in your tefillos!
In my Modern British and American Poetry class (sounds fancy, I know), one thing we learn to analyze is not just the wording of the poem itself and its context, but rather the format and structure of each piece, because that can have a whole meaning unto itself that lends insight into the poem.
When looking at the structure of this weeks parsha, it seems strange that it begins with, what most would consider, an ending. Avraham’s beloved Sarah dies, and Rashi explains that the reason was because she heard that Avraham had sacrificed their son Yitzchak, and so she died from grief on the spot. However- the story of akeidas Yitzchak happened in LAST weeks parsha- so shouldn’t the story of Sarah’s death and burial be the ending of parshas Vayeira instead of the beginning of parshas Chayei Sara?? Additionally, if Sarah is hardly even in this parsha besides for a few of the first pasukim regarding her death, then why is the whole parsha named after her?
One of the most important qualities of a good marriage is that of true partnership. The ability of a husband and wife to share the same life goals and purpose, by recognizing their individual roles within their equal partnership with each other and with Hakadosh Baruch Hu is key in a beautiful successful marriage. According to Shira Smiles, Avraham and Sarah epitomized this partnership, making them the model couple in the ideal marriage. One example of this is how Hashem tells Avraham “V’loh yikareh od es shimcha AVRAM, v’haya shimcha AVRAHAM”-“Your name shall no longer be called Avram; your name shall be Avraham” (17;5) and a few pasukim later Hashem says, “Sarai ishtecha loh tikrah es shma Sarai, ki SARAH shma!”- “Sarai your wife- you shall not call her name Sarai because Sarah is her name” (17;15). From the language, Hashem is implying that he is changing Avraham’s name at that moment, and then later when referring to Sarah, it seems as though her name had ALREADY been changed- like “HELLOO Avraham, don’t call her Sarai anymore, because her name is actually Sarah already!” But WHEN did Sarai’s name change?? The mefarshim tell us that the reason for this language is because Sarah’s name was already changed earlier- at the exact moment that Avraham’s name was changed (10 pasukim earlier)! Avraham and Sarah were such united partners that when one’s name (and thus role) changed, so did the other one at that same time.
The Rav notes a key proof of Avraham and Sarah’s partnership- the fact that in this weeks parsha, with the death of Sarah Immeinu, comes the ending of Avraham’s story. Without his partner, his other half, his ezer k’negdo, he was unable to continue his lifework of bringing people to closer Hashem. Avraham and Sarah were one, and were only able to reach their potential by working as partners together. Not saying that chas veshalom Avraham could no longer serve Hashem once Sarah was nifteres- but rather he could no longer fulfill his life mission in the same way without his life partner, - as Shira Smiles writes; “They could not work one without the other and all viewers of the story would agree that the perfect finale for a couple so intertwined would be to walk off the stage together hand in hand.”- this is why this parsha starts with the death of Sarah- because her death holds so much significance (and can’t just be stuck at the end of a parsha) because with her death marks the end of BOTH Sarah and Avraham’s missions and great contributions to klal Yisroel.
This parsha is not just about the end of Sarah and Avraham, but it is also about the continuation of their legacy through Yitzchak, and the incredible wife Eliezer finds for him, Rivka. The point of this search was to find someone who could continue on with Sarah’s legacy of chesed and kedusha. Rashi explains how Rivka continued with Sarah’s legacy by commenting on the pasuk’ “Vayavieha Yitzchak ha’ohela Sarah imo,” “Yitchak brought her into the tent of Sarah” (24;67). Rashi elaborates (sorry- this ones too long for me to type in hebrew!) “And he brought her into the tent- and behold, she was ‘Sarah his mother;’ that is to say, then she became the image of Sarah his mother. For all the time that Sarah was alive, a lamp burned from erev Shabbos to erev Shabbos, a bracha was present in the dough, and a cloud hung over the tent. When she died, these things departed. But when Rivka came, they all returned.”
Sarah’s tent was her bayis, and as we know, the Jewish home is the center of the Jewish family, and one of the most important places of kedusha. According to Rav Wallerstein on last weeks parsha, why was it so important for Avraham and Sarah’s 3 guests to wash their feet before they came into the house? Because their feet were filled with stones of avodah zara- and they didn’t want even a TRACE of the DUST of avodah zara to come into their sacred bayis. From this Rashi, we see even more of the kedusha that emanated from Sarah’s bayis. So we see that Sarah’s tent was clearly full of kedusha- but what is the significance of the 3 special miracles that took place in it? According to the Shem Mishmuel, these 3 miracles in her tent can be compared to the 3 miracles that Hashem showed Am Yisroel in the mishkan (here is a chart I made below to make it easier to understand)
| Sarah’s Tent | Mishkan |
| “A lamp burned from erev Shabbos to erev Shabbos” | The ner hama’aravi (the westernmost lamp of the menorah) in the Mishkan that continuously burned |
| “A bracha was present in the dough” | The lechem hapanim (the 12 loaves of bread) in the Mishkan remained hot and fresh from week to week, with a special bracha to them that allowed a kohein who ate even a little bit to be satisfied |
| “A cloud hung over the tent” | The ananei hakavod (Clouds of Glory) rested on the Mishkan |
Sarah shows us that it is possible to bring the shecinah into our very homes, making it truly into its own mishkan. Sarah truly epitomizes the words “V’asu li mikdash v’shachanti b’socham.” Now we can see why this weeks parsha is named after Sarah- for in her death she left her beautiful kedushadik bayis- the bayis that in a sense housed all of klal Yisroel- EMPTY. In my humble opinion, I believe that this tragedy was so harmful for the future of the Jewish people, that this is the reason that RIGHT AWAY Avraham needed to find a shidduch for Yitzchak- he needed a replacement for Sarah to act as the new mother and bayis-protector of the Jewish people! That is the reason why right when Rivka was brought to Yitzchak, the VERY FIRST THING he did was bring him into his mother Sarah’s tent. When he saw that all the special miracles that had been present with Sarah, came back with Rivka, he knew that she was “the one”- for she was able to hold up the kedusha of the bayis!
May you all find chizuk in this message and strengthen your partnerships, and strengthen your bayis so that you keep it full of kedusha- so that it can be zoche to be a kli to be mekabel all the most beautiful brachos from Hakadosh Baruch Hu!
And may you all find yourselves a nice shidduch in the right time with the right person with clarity, bracha, hatzlacha, and kedusha!
