“Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?” — Robin Williams
“Don’t be so humble — you're not that great.” ― Golda Meir
“In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.”
“I’m not superstitious … but I am a littlestitious.”
“I want my children to have all the things I couldn’t afford. Then I want to move in with them.”
“When I was a kid my parents moved a lot, but I always found them.”
“Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.”
Someone asked me, if I were stranded on a desert island what book would I bring: ‘How to Build a Boat.’”
“My therapist says I’m afraid of success. I guess I could understand that, because after all, fulfilling my potential would really cut into my sitting-around time.”
“I told my doctor I broke my arm in two places. He told me to keep out of those places.”
“Adults are always asking children what they want to be when they grow up because they’re looking for ideas.”
“When you’re good at something, you’ll tell everyone. When you’re great at something, they’ll tell you.”
“The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.”
“It’s just a job. Grass grows, birds fly, waves pound the sand. I beat people up.” ― Muhammad Ali
“If you had to identify in one word the reason why the human race has not achieved and never will achieve its full potential, that word would be ‘meetings.’”
“People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.” ― A.A. Milne, “Winnie-the-Pooh”
“No man goes before his time — unless the boss leaves early.” — Groucho Marx