This is a topic that keeps appearing on the scene.
People have the title "Rabbi" and yet do things that cause mammoth chillulei Hashem in the world. It gets all over the papers and Internet and people lose their faith in Rabbonim.
So let me set the record straight: If someone is pogem bris [is not careful in sexual matters] then he should be completely shunned and banished. People shouldn't follow or revere him, no matter how charismatic he is or how great in Torah. ראשית חכמה יראת השם - The BEGINNING of all wisdom is Yiras Hashem. Without Yiras Shomayim it doesn't even start.
Many people are probably reading this and saying "Of course! What is he saying that I don't know?!"
Well - even after terrible things are revealed and the Rabbis even ADMIT that the charges are correct, people still follow them. How can one follow a man who rapes women רח"ל?? Yet people with beards and peyos follow him. How can one follow a man who acts out on his same sex attraction [with his students]? Yet people do. People are die hard. It doesn't matter what he does - he is my Rabbi. That is NUTSSS! We are serving Hashem while Tzadikim and Rabbonim are just here to help us get closer but when they are themselves so spiritually contaminated then how can we keep following them?
They sometimes have their own websites with their Torah and are even featured on other websites. The moment allegations are proven then there names should be wiped off the Rabbinic map. But no - their shiurim remain and new ones appear even after the stories come out.
What is more bothersome is that time and again, when these stories come out - there is no public apology for the chillul Hashem and for the pain caused to the victims. It is unthinkable that this should happen but it does - again and again.
Baruch Hashem - Klal Yisrael has many true and great Tzadikim whom we can follow and learn from. Why do we have to go to these shady characters??
One Rabbi [many years back] had to give up his position as Rosh Yeshiva because he was with an אשת איש who had to divorce her husband. I heard that today he is the Rav of a shul. How can one have a Rav who was with an אשת איש??
Ahhhh - what about teshuva? Aren't people allowed to make mistakes??! Didn't some of our gedolim over history sin and then do teshuva??!
That is true. We do believe in teshuva but we must be VERRRRRYYYY careful before assuming someone did teshuva, especially when he repeatedly sinned after being warned and because these people are often sick and teshuva is only possible after serious therapy. When someone [who is a huge talmid chochom and a chavrusa of the Steipler] spends years in foreign countries running away from the police [all the while causing Torah and it's representatives to be seen in a terrible light] and finally comes back and admits his disgusting acts - that doesn't sound like teshuva to me. Rabbonim from his own group denounced him and told people that he is dangerous and to stay away - but that doesn't stop people.
Sweetest friends - Tzadikei Emes are so sweet. They are filled with love, chesed, mercy and every middah tova. Seek them out. If someone is even accused of wrongdoing, while it is forbidden to believe the allegations, למיחש מיהא בעי - one must be wary.
Be wary of people who are negative, talking against and putting down people who don't agree with them. Be wary of people who are less than honest in their dealings with money. Be wary of people who talk a lot about themselves and their accomplishments - even if they seem impressive. People spend years convincing themselves that they are somebody they are not. Be wary of angry people. Anger is avodah zara. Be wary of people who humiliate others or who use filthy words. Don't be fooled by their important positons or connections to big money.
Go for the happy, ruchani, sweet, kind and giving people who are constantly involved in Torah, tefilla and chesed. Look for people who are serving G-d and not themselves.
If you seek - you will find.
This is not a whistle blowing blog and I have no intention of naming names - but there are people out there who are spiritual and emotional dangers to all of us.
There are also people out there who are so holy that you will never be the same after you connect with them.
אם הרב דומה למלאך ה' צבאות יבקש תורה מפיהו!