One of the main points I have tried to make on these pages over the years is as follows: Everyone needs a Rav or Rebbi, as it says in Pirkei Avos: עשה לך רב.
So one has to pick at least one. Why pick a Rav who publicly hugs women or who was convicted of inappropriate sexually charged contact with his male students or sat in jail for stealing and lying or rape or emotionally abuses his students [examples that apply to some very popular rabbis that have so many followers - there are many other examples and simply horrific stories]? There are SO MANY who don't look at women [for pleasure] who aren't their wives much less touch them חס ושלום, who aren't attracted to their male students, who are very honest in financial matters, who are kind and sensitive and try never to hurt a soul [and if they do they apologize and don't claim that since they love their students they can say whatever they want and cause a lifetime of trauma. I know one boy who was berated so severely by his "Rebbi" that he lay down on the couch in his office and ... vomited].
Why is it that some people, people who are otherwise rational, reasonable people, are drawn to those who are so glaringly flawed and inadequate? Part of it is charisma. Some people have so much charisma that people follow them despite their serious flaws. Some see them as the father figure they always wished they had - and who is willing to let go of a father? Some ascribe to them supernatural powers and if someone is a miracle worker then how can he be a sinner?
Charisma is often dangerous, find a better father figure and miracles mean very little [רמז לדבר - אותות ומופתים באדמת בני חם]. The miracles are only significant if they are accompanied by exemplary character and Yiras Shomayim.
The gemara says אם הרב דומה למלאך ה' צבאות יבקשו תורה מפיהו - One's Rebbi should ideally be like an angel. Even if he is not - at least one who tries to be like an angel, one who doesn't cause public chilulei Hashem etc.
Nobody is perfect. Not even gedolim. Not even Admorim. Not anyone. Only Hashem. But one should make every effort to avoid following in the ways of those who have serious emotional and spiritual deficiencies and follow those Tzadikim who lives are קודש לשם.
