How is it that Yaakov didn't recognize Leah? How does one have relations with a woman, with his kallah on the first night [!!] and not even look at her?? And what about afterward - he just separated and went to sleep?? [I wouldn't bring this up but the Torah does. תורה היא וללמוד אני צריך]
There is a great lesson here for our generation where all sense of sexual propriety has been shattered. The gemara says יעקב אבינו לא מת - Yaakov never died. He was אמת which is מת with an א. The א represents אלופו של עולם - i.e. the Master of the World, Hashem, for whom there is no death. Yaakov was deeply connected to the source of life and thus didn't die [whatever that means]. The א neutralizes the מת.
Chazal say that he never had a seminal emission [not bad for someone who probably got married at 84]. Semen is life. A seminal emission is death. Yaakov NEVER died and thus never had a seminal emission.
When Yaakov is on his wedding night, explains the Ohr Hachaim, he wanted to get it over with quickly, lest some seed accidentally spill before the proper time. After he was finished, he didn't look at his kallah because he was so pure and didn't want to get pleasure for no reason. So he didn't see her until the morning. ויהי בבוקר והנה היא לאה.
[This also resolves the question many ask: How could he kiss Rochel when he saw her and before they were married? This is only a question if he was a regular human being - but he wasn't. Also, it was before the Torah was given. And anyway, everybody knows the Kabbalistic explanation ... See the Be'er Moshe and others].
