"The main purpose of her [Yemima Avital's] theory is quite prosaic: to be able to
listen and respond calmly to everyone who turns to us, to be able to
stay emotionally balanced in the face of every event in life. The
method includes a few essentials, articulated through a special vocabulary: diyuk (accuracy), presence, the present time, being ‘‘in your
place,’’ separation from the omes (weight, heaviness, burden), tihum
(limitation, fixing boundaries, demarcation), hakarah pe’ila (active
awareness), being good with myself, regesh le’kiyumi (having positive
feelings towards my existence), and so on.
The presumption is that
our conventional situation is one of omes, meaning that we bring to
every occasion—whether a special and critical meeting or a regular
phone call—our entire past (including failures, success, rigid patterns
of response, disappointments etc.) and our future (including expectations, fears etc.). We are thus prevented from being in the concrete
moment with all its uniqueness, listening carefully to what is said (and
not through filters of ‘‘I know what you are going to say’’/ ‘‘you never
trust me’’/ ‘‘I always fail to explain myself’’/ ‘‘this will lead to ...’’ etc.) and responding accurately (diyuk) to the present situation, its participants, time, place, and circumstances. The omes is the uncomfortable
sense of distress we feel whenever any negative emotions arise. Being
able to listen carefully; ‘‘clean’’ listening; not being manipulated by my
partner’s response; the ability to become involved in all the specific
elements of the present state and at the same time to be separate
(midat rohak) from the situation—all these lead to diyuk.
According to Yemima’s view, essential human nature is of goodness and light, but people are blind to this because it has been fogged up by their omes, their self-criticism, doubt, hurt, anger, fear, all old immediate emotions and patterns of response and people’s identification with them. The task is to learn to separate from this omes and realize that one is larger than her/his criticism, doubt, hurt, fear, anger and so on. The omes results from old hurts and old habits established from an early age and then deeply ingrained. The ability to separate from the hurt inner child is supposed to heal it, without the need to delve into memory of past trauma.
The purpose of the learning is to reset the system. The student learns to practice present-moment awareness, compassion and kindness at a basic level. She/he learns to give to others by learning how to give to herself/himself. Awareness of other people’s omes is useful for recognizing that they act out of pain—just like the one they hurt—and thus reducing the hurt that their words may cause."
According to Yemima’s view, essential human nature is of goodness and light, but people are blind to this because it has been fogged up by their omes, their self-criticism, doubt, hurt, anger, fear, all old immediate emotions and patterns of response and people’s identification with them. The task is to learn to separate from this omes and realize that one is larger than her/his criticism, doubt, hurt, fear, anger and so on. The omes results from old hurts and old habits established from an early age and then deeply ingrained. The ability to separate from the hurt inner child is supposed to heal it, without the need to delve into memory of past trauma.
The purpose of the learning is to reset the system. The student learns to practice present-moment awareness, compassion and kindness at a basic level. She/he learns to give to others by learning how to give to herself/himself. Awareness of other people’s omes is useful for recognizing that they act out of pain—just like the one they hurt—and thus reducing the hurt that their words may cause."
