The dating scene is tough these days, shidduch crisis and all. It's important for the meidlach to be careful about the buchrim they choose.
Protect yourself by keeping a close eye out for these very concerning warning signs in the bachur you're dating.
Look out for these dating red flags:
He doesn't open the door for you: Self-centered. He might be abusive.
He opens the door for you: He's too nice. Or maybe just putting on a show.
He doesn't text back: He clearly hates you and is being unspeakably cruel. He should die.
He texts back right away: What a weirdo. So needy. Creepy almost.
He brings a sefer to the date: Might not be interested in you and will later claim that he is too busy learning to ever help around the house.
He doesn't bring a sefer to the date: בטלן. He might never be קובע עיתים.
He wears his hat while driving: Too uptight. Doesn't know how to relax.
He takes off his hat before driving: Maybe not a serious Yarei Shomayim. He might hear a Kedushah on the way and how can he answer without a hat? Might be a sign that he doesn't keep kosher.
Uses a lot of Aramiac and Yiddish expressions: You won't be able to communicate with a person who speaks foreign languages. Farshteit-zich.
Doesn't use a lot of Aramiac and Yiddish expressions: Possible not a Torah-dike bachur [unless you are Sefardi. Then he should be speaking some Ladino].
Loves Ben Shapiro: A true Ben Torah never HEARD of Ben Shapiro.
Doesn't know the difference between Ben Shapiro and Mordechai Shapiro: Not worldly. Also might have secret ties to Hamas.
His father was in jail: Ten years in Otisville on tax evasion and fraud.
His father was never in jail: Well, almost everybody who lives in his block was, so what is he hiding??? SCCCAAARRRYYYY!!!
He makes less than $500k a year [if he is already working]: You need a man who can give you the lifestyle you deserve. And how are you going to afford Yeshiva tuition?
He makes more than $500k a year: Sounds like a workaholic. Stay away, ladies. And too gashmiyus-dik and materialistic. Spiritually dangerous.
Says Hallel on Yom Haatzmaut and Yom Yerushalayim: Too Zionist. He will want to send his children to places like Yeshiva of Flatbush, Camp Lavi or even Camp Ramah. He clearly doesn't follow Gedolei Yisroel.
Doesn't say Hallel on Yom Haatzmaut and Yom Yerushalayim: Doesn't appreciate Hashem's Chesed and Nissim. Who knows when he will stop keeping Shabbos and kosher? He will never agree to make Aliyah.
Very close to his parents: Has attachment issues.
Not very close to his parents: Has attachment issues.
He works out at the gym: This might indicate an unhealthy obsession with his appearance. Be careful.
He doesn't work out at the gym: Who wants a flabby dude who doesn't take care of himself? Laziness is a terrible quality. He probably doesn't get up for minyan either.
He won't share his feelings: He's closed off. He's hiding something from you. He's probably a serial killer. Run.
He shares his feelings: Feminine. He might be gay.
Asks his Rebbi everything: Not an independent, mature person.
Doesn't ask his Rebbe everything: Maybe he doesn't trust Da'as Torah. Be careful.
Suffers from hypothermia: Was in the freezer for a tad bit too long.
You see him swallowing a pill. Might be manic depressive. Or maybe it is just lactose pills b/c he is lactose intolerant. [But then again - you want a tolerant boy]. Check that out.
Reads Mevakesh Lev.
Doesn't read Mevakesh Lev.
Yikes. Ladies, if you see any of these red flags, RUN.
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Mussar Haskels: Chill. We don't know any person at all until we live under the same roof for a significant amount of time.
Daven.
