The Consequences Of Your Actions

From a song I listened to far too many times in my childhood [sorry for posting lyrics during sfira:)]:

Honesty is such a lonely word.
Everyone is so untrue.
Honesty is hardly ever heard.
And mostly what I need from you.

I can always find someone
to say they sympathize.
If I wear my heart out on my sleeve.
But I don't want some pretty face
to tell me pretty lies.
All I want is someone to believe. 

A new scandal has just emerged. A leading Modern-Orthodox Rabbi has ADMITTED to being dishonest when lying to a reporter. He is being accused of much worse.

I will not get into the story or the allegations but will just say this: This individual is one who makes his voice heard on a whole range of ethical and moral [not quite sure what the difference between those two words are] issues. He is a Dayan who presides on a Beis Din. He is considered a leader and guide by many as one who successfully bridges the gap between the secular and religious world.

When a person such as this is involved in any wrongdoing people think: "If I can't trust HIS credibility then whom CAN I trust." Such behavior ruins it for EVERYONE because then people lose their faith in Rabbis - and everybody else. I have seen so much in my life that I really don't know whom I can trust. It takes a loooong time until I fully trust anybody and still remain with the fear that at some point the person will be revealed as an imposter. Scary. But that is the result of so many prominent people whom I respected and were discovered to be corrupt.

An example of the effects of people's actions: Last week I went to purchase the upgrade for my Otzar Hachachma program [up to over 60 thousand sefarim!!]. It was a long bus ride to get there but well worth it. When I arrived I realized that I had left my credit card and checks at home. All I had was 900 shekel in cash [rich guy that Ehrman dude] and it cost 1400 shekel. I figured "No sweat. I am a good, long standing, faithful customer and they can trust me. I will give them the cash and when I get home I will give my credit card number and they will get the rest of the money".

I figured wrong.

The nice lady wouldn't hear of it. "Sorry, it's happened too many times that people forgot [we hope it was just "forgot"] to pay. Either you pay in full or I can't give it to you". [I wanted to say "Hey!! I am 300 thousand dollars, twenty students and six employees away from being a Rosh Yeshiva. You can trust me!:)]

Meaning, they learned that people can't be trusted so EVERYONE, even the trustworthy ones, lose. My crestfallen countenance didn't influence her in the slightest and I went home empty handed and had to make the trek again the next day.

Not the end of the world but a shame. The people who buy this program are all serious lomdei Torah but something so basic as paying for what you bought is lost. The excuse of "I forgot" is shvach.

Why? Because a person never forgets what is really important to him. NOBODY forgets to go to his wedding. Or to put his pants on in the morning.

When  I was a yeshiva boy back in my youth, there was something called asimonim. These were special coins used to pay for telephone calls. A common request in yeshiva was "Can I borrow an asimon?" Of course. Why not.

Interesting.

It almost NEVER happened that the person returned the asimon he had borrowed. According to halacha that is STEALING:). At the time the call was important, the person was almost desperate and he fully intended to return it. But once the call was made it stopped being so important and the asimon was forgotten.

Remember sweet friends. Your actions often have consequences more far reaching than you ever imagined.