The Real You

Chazal, our Sages, were brilliant people. Learning Torah and seeing the depths of understanding they possessed is awe-inspiring.

Let us take one example: Chazal teach that there are three ways to get to know a person for real: בכיסו בכוסו ובכעסו.

When a person gets angry, you see the real him.

When he drinks, all the secrets tumble out. If he is filled with Torah, then words of Torah emanate from his mouth. If he is a fan at a football game or at a bar and he gets drunk, in all likelihood he will get into a fight with someone else and say "lovely delightful" words.

The last example is something I have learned in the last two years. בכיסו. His pocket. Money. People can put on a great show until it comes to their pocketbooks. Then the real them comes out. Sometimes it is heartwarming and inspiring to see. Other times, painful. Like a friend of mine, an orthodontist, once told me כולם חברים שלך, עד ש - everyone can pretend to be your friend until.... The moment finances are involved, the real them comes out. How interesting that Chazal say that במקום חסרון כיס in a case of financial loss, צריך זירוז,  people need to be encouraged to do the mitzvos. Everybody knows how important mitzvos are, but still, when it costs them, they become reluctant.

This makes me sad. There are many people about whom I wish I could continue living under the illusion that they are fine people through and through. But knowing their relationship to money casts a pallor over their character.

An Ohr Hachaim in numerous places: Hashem gives people extra money so that they can give it away. When a poor man comes to my door, he is really asking for HIS money. Hashem just gave it to me to hold onto until he needed it. I am like a teller at the bank. I am giving the customer his own money. אם כסף תלוה את עמי את העני עמך. The עני's money is עמך, with you. So when you give it, give with joy. It gives you lots of great olam haba and in addition it really enhances your olam hazeh.

There was once lived great tzaddik and talmid chochom who used to collect money for the poor named Rabbi Schwartz. He once entered a store and asked the store owner, a well known miser, for a contribution. The man promptly gave Rabbi Schwartz a slap in the face.

Rabbi Schwartz didn't miss a beat and said "That was for me. What do you have for the poor."

The man gave him money.....:):)