In our society we hear a lot about the suffering of victims of abuse. There is something tremendously inspiring about the story of Yosef Hatzadik. He was abused. His brothers hated him [emotional abuse], threw him into a pit [physical abuse], and sold him into slavery [they had their reasons but that is not our point]. Then he was sexually abused by the wife of Potiphar. Afterward, as an innocent victim he spent ten years in a horrific Egyptian pit compared to which our worst times ever would be a picnic by comparison. TEN YEARS!! And for what? For doing the right thing. For not sleeping with a woman who was dying to have him. He was punished for controlling his sexual urges and being faithful to some Arab מושחת חולירע [excuse the terms of endearment] named Potiphar.
Not a victim. A SUPER-VICTIM!!! Yet, not a word of self pity. No crying or bemoaning his fate. Always concerned with other people ["מדוע פניכם רעים היום", giving the eitza to Paroh how to save his country from famine], unfailingly modest [בלעדי אלקים יענה את שלום פרעה], always seeing the good [כי למחיה שלחני אלקים] and never despairing [כי אם זכרתני]. No anger at the Sar Hamshkim for forgetting him. No desire for vengeance against his brothers or אשת פוטיפר. WHAT A TZADIK. He is not called "Yosef Hatzadik" for nothing.
I am not critical of people who suffered trauma because they were abused. Such people deserve sympathy and love. But those people can use Yosef as an example of someone who overcome the most difficult of circumstances and shined.
WE ARE ALL VICTIMS!!!!
Digest that.
WE ARE ALL VICTIMS.
We are victims of very imperfect parents who raised us [as hard as they might have tried]. We are the victims of imperfect siblings who might have hurt us in different ways. We are all victims of a spouse who is not always there to meet our needs and even hurts us at times [unless we are single in which case we are victims of the cruel reality of loneliness]. We are victims of an educational system that quashed our individuality and uniqueness. We are victims of all of the people who let us down or took advantage of us. We are all victims of physical [digestion issues? feel tired most of the time? allergies? the list is endless and we all have something] and emotional challenges [anger? laziness? fears? anxiety? OCD? ADD? The list can good on for the thousands of pages of the DSM].
So we learn a MOIRRRRREEEEE-DIKKKKEEEEE YESOOOOOOODD from Yosef Hatzadik - GET OVER IT:-)-:).
Go to therapy if you need to. Confront the issues. Deal with the pain. Then get over it. Move on. Use your experiences to make you a stronger person. But don't allow yourself to fall into the trap of using your victimhood as an excuse.
Yosef didn't and look where he ended up. זכותו יגן עלינו!!!
