The Ibn Ezra famously asks - How can the Torah command us לא תחמוד - don't covet your friend's wife or car or house etc.?? How can this be? His wife is a critical, harsh, angry, tense and unattractive person [in his eyes]. His neighbor's wife is sweet, kind and beautiful [in his eyes - he doesn't really know her...]. Is it possible NOT to covet?? How can the Torah command us how to FEEL??
The question is based on a debatable premise. The Rambam [based on Chazal] says that one does not transgress לא תחמוד until he nags his friend and ultimately he acquires the woman or object for himself. So there is no איסור חימוד on the mere feeling. The question doesn't even start!!
Of course, the Ibn Ezra [like the other "פשטנים"] explains psukim על פי פשוטם and not based on מסורת חז"ל. So that explains his question.
It is also important to note that if the Torah phrased the איסור in terms of mere feeling, that would indicate that the feeling is not recommended, even if strictly speaking a מעשה is required.
See the Ibn Ezra's answer. What is important for us is that if the Torah forbids a feeling, that means THAT WE HAVE CONTROL OVER OUR FEELINGS AND EMOTIONS.
One who doesn't needs therapy and/or medication.
