1] I was considering having a mid-life crisis but the odds of me making it to 100 are very slim - so I think I missed the boat.
2] It looks like my childhood dream of being a pro athlete AIN'T HAPPENIN'.
3] When I was a child, all old Jewish men had European accents. So I am debating when I should switch my accent and sound like I was born and raised in Poland. Maybe when I am 60.
4] I don't want to grow up - I'm a Toys R' Us kid. [You have to know commercials from the '80s to get that].
