Atah Nigleisa

“How did you survive?”
This is the question Dr. Moshe Kerstein, a cardiopulmonary specialist, always asked a patient when he saw they had a number engraved on his arm.
On one occasion, an elderly man replied with two words, *"Atah nigleisa.”*
Seeing the perplexed look on the doctor's face, he began to elaborate with a story.
“I was in Treblinka, and there was only one month left till Rosh Hashanah. All of us in the barracks desperately wanted to hold onto our Yiddishkeit. But what could we possibly do?
“I then asked my friends if anyone remembered anything from the Rosh Hashanah davening.
“I seemed to be the only one to remember the tefilos and since I had a neat handwriting, I was nominated to write them down. We somehow smuggled in a pen and paper and after a backbreaking day of labor, I managed to muster the energy to write everything down that I remembered.
This went on night after night when everyone was already long asleep. I managed to finish the whole Shachris and most of Mussaf .
“Finally on Erev Rosh Hoshana, I was putting down the finishing touches of the Mussaf Shmoneh Esrei, with the final of the central blessings (which begins with the words): ‘Atah nigleisa ba'anan kevodecha – You were revealed in your cloud of glory', recalling to G-d how, when He was to give His Torah to Israel] He revealed His presence in the Presence of a thick cloud... Suddenly, I felt a flashlight shining on my face.
“ ‘So what do we have here?’ the German officer barked.
“His sinister tone in his voice indicated where this was heading, so I felt I had nothing to lose by telling him the truth. I told him I was writing a prayer book for the high holidays.
“ ‘What are you writing in this prayer book of yours?’
“ ‘ I'm writing the words: ‘Atah nigleisa’ which means that He, G-d, were revealed in a cloud of His glory.’ I answered, figuring I had nothing to lose.
“I should kill you for your audacity!" the German officer screamed. ‘The only clouds I see here are the clouds of your brothers and sisters’ remains being burned.
“I assumed that within the next few moments he would announce my fate and I prepared for the worst.
I was not prepared for what was coming next.
“ ‘I should really kill you for your audacity. But I can’t help but notice your extraordinarily beautiful handwriting. As I continue to climb the ladder of rank, my job requires me to write many letters to Berlin. Therefore, I am going to hire you as my personal scribe. They’ll be very impressed with me in Nazi headquarters.’”
The old man concluded his story.
He then repeated to Dr. Kirstein, *“Atah Nigleisa ba'anan kevodecha…” You, G-d, were revealed in your cloud of glory'- “That is how I survived.”*
~~~
This Tefillah mentions Hashem being revealed - in a cloud. Of all things! Not in a fire, and not in a chariot. But in a murky cloud. Clouds signify the concealment of light. But what do clouds produce? The earth’s biggest blessing.
Sometimes Hashem’s glory is concealed in something which seems to block out all good, all glory, all light. But like a cloud, it turns out to be our biggest blessing.
Let us all look out for these times.
~~~
Adapted from Touched by their Spirit by Rabbi Yechiel Spero