Tzvi Moshe With Golden Words On The Golden Calf

"I did it my way"

Ol' Blue Eyes

In this week’s Parsha, on the backdrop of the completion of the plans for the Mishkan, the giving of Shabbos Kodesh, and the giving of the Luchos Rishonos, the first tablets - the Cheit HaEigel, the sin of the Golden Calf, dramatically alters the scene as a central tragedy in the relationship between the Jewish people and Hashem. In a total misdirection of an internal drive to serve HaKadosh Baruch Hu, the Jews earn themselves a death sentence that is only removed at the last second. After the nation is forgiven, the Parshios continue with the actual construction of the Mishkan based on the plans that we read about before. As we will see, the Eigel HaZahav, the Golden Calf, is built into the very fabric of the Mishkan, and we will also discover what this means for our Avodas Hashem.


Just to list a few important facts: The Machatzis HaShekel, the sum of money given by every person in the camp, is defined in the Passuk as a “ransom for your lives.” How is this so? The Midrash Tanchuma says that the Machatzis HaShekel serves as money-in-the-bank, as protection for the sin of the Eigel HaZahav. But the sin happened after the donation! Why did Hashem give us the protective shield before we sinned? Clearly, Hashem was constructing a system around the impending Cheit HaEigel.

Furthermore: When we inaugurated the Kohanim in last week’s Parsha we did so with a young bull. Rashi explains there that this parallels the Eigel HaZahav as well. But our previous question remains – the sin did not happen yet! How can the parallel to the sin be created before the sin itself occurred?

And how did the Kohanim get the right to do the services in the Mishkan in the first place? We know that they replaced the first-borns who were originally supposed to be the priests. How did the first-borns lose the position? Their rights to Avodah in the Mishkan was taken away due to the Cheit HaEigel, and the Leviim and Kohanim picked up the mantle in their stead. But this is odd in that the Torah has been discussing Kohanim, out of the tribe of Levi, as the service-bearers of the Mishkan for as long as the plans for the Mishkan itself has been discussed. How did they pick up the ball that the first-borns dropped before they even dropped the ball?

Clearly Hashem was pulling strings around the upcoming Cheit HaEigel for the entirety of the planning of the Mishkan, and thus some suggest that the Eigel is an intrinsic lesson in how service should not be performed. The Mishkan may even be the necessary replacement for the Eigel HaZahav.

Let’s explain where the Jews went wrong.

The Midrash in Shemos Rabbah says that when HaKadosh Baruch Hu says Anochi in the first commandment, He rips open the seven heavens and comes charging down to earth in His Merkavah - His Ethereal Chariot. The Midrash continues saying that as this happens the Jews stare intently at the Merkavah. Among the few pieces of imagery on Hashem’s Chariot, one is an icon of… an Eigel. This is of central importance, as we will explain now.

The Nesivos Shalom puts things in perspective. The generation in the desert was the greatest generation in Jewish history. They were so infused with a desire to serve God that it penetrated every aspect of their thoughts and drives. But the greater the person is, the more his Yetzer HaRa is empowered. The Jews were dependent on Moshe to receive the will of God. When they were overwhelmed by the contact with the Divine, the Jews sent Moshe up the mountain. He was the source of their connection, and the second they thought he was gone – they panicked.

They were on such a high level that when the Yetzer HaRa to perform idolatry attacked, it came with such an overwhelming power, in combination with the panic, that they lost all common sense. The experiences of leaving Egypt and of speaking to God directly were little more than vague, distant memories, and not nearly enough to prevent them from sin.

So what did they do? They returned to basics. They relied on their instincts. They saw a problem, and without consulting God on the subject, they made a bad call. They said to themselves, “Remember when Hashem came down? There was a calf on that Chariot right? Let’s make that! That’ll connect us back to Hashem!” It mammash came from the best place. They had such good intentions. But at the end of the day, that’s not what matters.

The Rambam explains that the reason that Hashem commanded us to bring Korbanos, offerings, was to fill the basic human desire to connect to and serve something greater, and to steer that desire clear away from Avodah Zarah. We as Jews have the inborn desire to do an Avodah, we enjoy religion, it’s a beautiful thing. It’s only that things become dangerous when they become subjective.

Hashem makes a very clear statement with all of the allusions to the Eigel. Hashem is saying, “What you guys did was a display of a very powerful, important, beautiful, yet severely misdirected desire.” That the desire to serve is central, but the fact that He directs those references into a strict framework is coming to show us that our relationship with G-d is not up to us to define. Let’s go a step deeper.

When HaKadosh Baruch Hu designates the artisans who will carry out the craftsmanship of the Mishkan, He says that “U’v’Lev Kol Chacham-Lev Nasati Chochmah,” ‘I endowed the hearts of all the wise-hearted with wisdom.’ Hold on - if the hearts that Hashem is endowing are wise hearts, then why is He endowing those very same hearts with wisdom? They already have it!
This Passuk is reminiscent of a Gemara in Brachos 55a which says that Hashem only gives wisdom to those who are wise. We encounter the same problem. If they are wise, why is HaKadosh Baruch Hu giving them wisdom?

The Imrei Emes gives a beautiful answer, and with it we will understand our issue with greater insight. He says that the answer is contained in the Passuk from Tehilim 111:10 that we start off our day with. “Reishis Chochmah Yiras Hashem” ‘The start of all wisdom is fear of Heaven.’ He goes on to explain that based on this we can say that the wisdom that is the key to all other wisdoms is Yiras Shamayim.

This is what the Passuk means when it says “U’v’Lev Kol Chacham-Lev Nasati Chochmah,” ‘I endowed the hearts of all the wise-hearted with wisdom.’ Hashem instills the wisdom of craftsmanship, in essence, the wisdom of how to carry out His beautiful Ratzon, how to connect to Him, only within those who approach the job with Yiras Hashem, only to those who constantly ask “What does Hashem (not me) want my Avodas Hashem to be?” Not those who are concerned with what their gut says, not those who carry out Judaism based on what feels good – no. Only to those who approach Binyan HaMishkan, those who seek to transform their whole life through the lens of “Exactly what does Hashem want from me now?”

With this statement of “U’v’Lev Kol Chacham-Lev Nasati Chochmah,” Hashem is giving us the response to the Cheit HaEigel. Serving Hashem is a wonderful experience, but it’s a recipe for an empty and dangerous experience if it is devoid of really asking how He wants it done.

Do we know what the essence of a person is? Do we know the essence of a pig? Do we know what the cosmic interplay between them is and their damaging spiritual effect when a Jew consumes a pig? No. But Hashem does, and if we want to connect to Him we have to do it His way. We need to realize that there is no intrinsic value to ‘feeling close’ or having a ‘good heart’ unless it’s being done the way Hashem says. If not? It’s a recipe for living a life of the Cheit HaEigel and not a life of the Mishkan.

B’Ezras Hashem we should be Zoche to see this in our own lives; to come in contact with real Ratzon Hashem, and not to get caught up in gut feelings that can all too often pull us astray. If we can do this there is no doubt that we will live lives of meaning and fulfillment, moving closer to the Creator and ultimately the redemption!