My Moments In The Sun

Whatever I do, I try to walk after Hashem. I say "Hashem, you lead me and I follow." The Sfas Emes promises in many places that if someone lives that way s/he will see wonders - and wonders I see.

Today, I had to go to Yerushalayim to take care of something. The place I have to go to is only minutes away from where I used to live but now it is a long trip. There was no express bus at the time I needed to travel so I decided that I would get a "tremp" [hitch] from the neighborhood. 20 minutes and I'm there. Gevaldik. So I stand by the mikva which leads to the road to Yerushalayim, patiently waiting. And waiting. And waiting. A couple of cars passed by with empty spots but they were obviously in too big a rush to stop for me. Or maybe I looked too menacing:). 5' 10 and a half, 130 pounds, beard and dark suit, holding a sefer. Watch out. So I wait more. I convince myself that REALLY chashuv people stand in the hot sun waiting for someone to have mercy and take them into their car. So I must be really chashuv. Self-esteem saved. Always helps to delude yourself when necessary.

:)

Sorta brings me back to those many glorious hours I have spent waiting for trains all over the New York area. The atmosphere in the subway, the geshamke "Bnei and Bnos Toirah", the ambiance, the lovely live Spanish music I hear, the many different types of tattoos, everything, just make it a sublime experience. Back to our story...

I was out there for about 45 minutes or so [this is also on very little sleep so it wasn't the most pleasant] and suddenly I heard someone call my cousin "HaRav Ehrman, HaRav Ehrman!" I look around and my cousin is not there [I have a cousin who is a rabbi]. He is walking in my direction so he must mean me. It was a Rebbi in the local yeshiva who knows me. He says "Come meet the Rosh Yeshiva". So I walk across the street and he introduces me to the Rosh Yeshiva accompanied with some words of praise.

Well, as my reality is, I have been planning for a while to speak to the Rosh Yeshiva and ask for a job. It is quite embarrassing to ask for a job because rejection is almost always the outcome [at least for me:-)]. It is not fun coming across as needy and the asker usually wants the position a lot more than the giver wants to give it [very similar to fund raising]. But here I was talking to him, so I figured I'll give it a shot.

I told him what I have been doing the last two years [played a half a season for the Mets, invested 700 million dollars in Manhattan real estate, wrote a commentary to the Zohar Hakadosh, lectured in Jewish Philosophy at Harvard and served as chazan at the 5th Avenue Synagouge when Helfgot couldn't make it]. I then told him that I am free now and that maybe he could make use of my services. He asked me a very pointed question to which the answer he wanted to hear probably would have landed me a spot. I answered honestly [my last name means "honest man" and I try to live up to that]. It is not clear how much he liked my answer. We chatted for a little while and he took my number down, I blessed him with hatzlacha and we parted.

I went across the street and minutes later a car stops for me and a short time later I was in Yerushalayim.

AHHHHH!!!

This is significant because, ultimately, I have control over nothing. Not my job, not my health, not my very existence. ALL I can do is my part and let Hashem do His magic. So today I did my part and I will let Hashem take it from here. If it works out - great. If not - I will do something else. Shwekey keeps asking me to join in on a concert tour, so maybe I'll do that. Im lo aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh-aaleeehhhhh, im lo aaaaaahhhhhh-aaaaleeeh es yerushala-a-a-ayim a-a-aaal rooooosshhhhh simchasiii-e-e alllll-ih rosh al roooo-ooosh simchasiiii.

So I had to wait in the sun to have this meeting and it was worth it as now it is off my mind. I also look like I just spent a week in Miami Beach. Beet red:-)!

So sweetest friends - go with Hashem. Do your part and then be at peace and let Him decide the outcome. This applies to shidduchim, raising kids, parnassa, everything.