Saturday, November 26, 2011

Feeling The Other

This is deep.

We only experience other people and the world as refracted through the prism of our own consciousness. So when we are at a wedding we only feel joy as ourselves for the couple but don't actually feel the feelings of the couple. At a funeral we will feel our OWN sense of loss but not that of the dearly departed. We can never step out of ourselves - even for one moment.

This is why our sense of joy or sadness at what goes on is directly proportional to the closeness we feel to the parties involved. So if a Jew gets married you are happier than if a non-jew does. If you know the person more than if you don't know the person. If are close to the person more than if you are not, etc. etc.

What's my point??? THE TORAH WANTS US TO STEP OUT OF OURSELVES AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE - DESPITE THE DIFFICULTY. We intuitively may feel that we are the center of the universe, but if I am then so is my friend! G-d loves my children but he loves the children down the block JUST AS MUCH. Yet, I don't even know the names of the children down the block! Why is that? Excessive immersion in the self.

Here is a passage that Hashem brought to my attention: Everything in my own immediate experience supports my deep belief that I am the absolute center of the universe; the realist, most vivid and important person in existence. We rarely think about this sort of natural, basic self-centeredness because it's so socially repulsive. But it's pretty much the same for all of us. It is our default setting, hard-wired into our boards at birth. Think about it: there is no experience you have had that you are not the absolute center of. The world as you experience it is there in front of YOU or behind YOU, to the left or right of YOU, on YOUR TV or YOUR monitor. And so on. Other people's thoughts and feelings have to be communicated to you somehow, but your own are so immediate, urgent, real.

If one starts stepping outside of him/herself, NEW WORLDS OF CHESED, AHAVA, CARE AND COMPASSION OPEN UP!

This is huge. Would love to talk about it more. May next time we meet. Much easier verbally. I talk faster than I type!:-)

Love and blessings and a GUUUUUT VOOOOCHHH!