In the olden days, when I was a kid, phones were at home and had no caller ID. So if you called someone and the person didn't answer he was probably not home. But it wasn't because he was avoiding you because there was no way to know that the call was from you. Today things are different. When you call, wherever he or she may be - the call is seen and the receiver knows EXACTLY who is calling. So if the person doesn't answer it often means that they are purposely ignoring you [unless they are really unable to answer, like if they are davening]. Often, the person won't even call back - unless they think they have something to gain by returning your call.
I have noticed that people who expect to make money off me are very prompt in returning my calls. I am presently involved with someone who was GREAT with calls and emails until he got my money. Now he ignores most of them [even though he was given the money with the expectation that I would receive gracious and attentive service]. So it goes and so is the human animal. We have all been ignored hundreds and probably thousands of times by people who saw our name on caller ID and made a split second judgment that we aren't important enough to merit an answer.
Now if we would go up to the same person on the street and start talking to him - he would NEVER ignore us and pretend we don't exist. But on the phone people do it numerous times a day. It is social convention to answer people talking to us but we think we can get away ignoring them when we they can't see us. But G-d sees us. To pretend a person who needs to speak to me doesn't exist. AHHHH - What would the Alter of Slabodka, the father of the "gadlus ha-odom" mussar school say about that?
We ignore phone calls, emails etc. etc. answering or not answering based on one major criterion - what's in it for ME? I know kids who will ignore their parent's calls. I think how the kid would have fared as a baby if the parents had ignored his cries for food....
All I can ask is that as teshuva season approaches [and when ISN'T it a good time to do teshuva?!] we reconsider how we treat people.
This obviously doesn't mean that you have to answer every junk email or answer every call immediately but when the caller is a friend or acquaintance who is awaiting a response?
I just don't get it.
This whole system corrupts people's character.
#beamentsch
