Every time there is a scandal, it is the same script. Every time.
Accusations. Then denial by the accused. Always. He never admits guilt right away. [Two notable exceptions - The Biblical Yehuda and Dovid Hamelech]. His lawyer says "We will prove his innocence. All of the accusations are baseless". Lawyers NEVER say "My client is guilty. C'mon, 43 different women against him. Who are you going to believe??"
Then a trial and very often found guilty. He will only PLEAD guilty if he thinks it will get him a lighter sentence.
This is what SHOULD be when a religious Jew is involved רח"ל: Accusations [רח"ל]. Then an IMMEDIATE apology by the accused for the HORRIBLE חילול השם he has caused. "I am SOOOOO sorry. Hashem's Name has been disgraced through ME!!! מגלגלין חוב ע"י חייב. If I am the instrument for חילול השם then I must be guilty on SOME level. Chazal say so. I also apologize to religious Jews everywhere for giving us ALL a bad name and for making the Torah look bad" [See Yoma 86].
Then if he is guilty he should admit it, ask mechila from the victims and accept upon himself teshuva.
This NEVER happens [unless maybe if there is incontrovertible evidence that the person is guilty]. People HAVE to be right. It is like in sports. When the ref makes a controversial call, it is ALWAYS the team who loses from the call that complains. You will never see the players or coaches from the opposing team complain and say "Ref, you goofed! You should have called that in favor of the other team." Never.
I don't know if Chaim Walder is guilty as accused. Just in case - I am removing his books from my house. Rav Shmuel Eliyahu said that he received testimony in Beis Din from 22 different women. Very suspicious. There is an audio recording of him saying things that incriminate him [which of course his supporters will say is doctored to make it sound like him].
One thing is for sure. He was the subject of a mammoth חילול השם for which he never apologized [ditto numerous other famous personalities embroiled in scandals]. Committing suicide as a way to deal with a problem is a DANGEROUS example for the TENS OF THOUSANDS of people who looked up to him and read his books [including countless impressionable children]. One might argue that we can't judge what a person does under distress. I argue back that we have to make it clear that a] People must feel free to report abuse and not be afraid that they will be ridiculed. B] Suicide is the WORST solution to any problem. We are not allowed to be critical of the Avos but we learn from their actions - even their mistakes. Chaim Walder is no better. We must learn from him what NOT to do [even if he is innocent as he claimed until the end].
The bottom line his - he committed murder and the fact that he was perpetrator doesn't make it much better. We have no right to take our lives. We didn't ask to be put on earth and when we go is not up to us. We are ALLLLLLL dealing with stuff. We all have challenges. For some it is being a much older single. For others it is illness. For others it is an inability to pay the basic bills. Actually - we all have multiple things to deal with. The solution is as they say today: "Deal with it". If you can't manage alone - get help. But suicide is bad for the person himself, for his family and for society at large.
Not just bad. It is a horrible sin. The ONLY sin for which one can NEVER do Teshuva simply b/c Teshuva can only be done while alive. There is an expression in the sefarim that one who kills himself loses his portion in the world to come [Arizal, Aruch Hashulchan and many others].
