I heard in the name of a Rosh Yeshiva in Rabbeinu Yitzchak Elchanan that if one's wife wants to hold hands in public, the husband should acquiesce because it is a fulfillment of the mitzva of Onah [sexual relations].
Since it is not Purim and the person who repeated this is not a funny guy - I have to assume that he was serious.
So this Rav is saying that one should publicly fulfill his mitzva of Onah.
Ahhhh.
Anyway - I would much rather assume that the Rav never said this and was misquoted. Or he said it and but actually said that since it is a fulfillment of Onah it should NOT be done. But that is also a stretch. Onah is Onah.
My own attitude is that all physical affection for a spouse should be reserved for private places. Your relationship with your spouse is not a Facebook page for the world to see.
Of course, my opinion is meaningless. Who am I?
Bozo the blogger!!
But the Rema in Shulchan Aruch writes this.
Rabbi Henkin writes a teshuva [Bnei Bonim 4/12] where he tries to prove that it is permitted to hold hands from the fact that non-religious people do it and if it were an act that related to actual תשמיש then they wouldn't do it in public. It is odd to bring a proof from people who are often מנאפים and פרוצים בעריות [as pointed out in the sefer Asher Chanan 8/156].
So - love your wife, express both verbal and physical affection to your wife and most of all - give her lots of money and gifts, if you can. The secret to Shalom Bayit is that if you want shalom - buy it!
But keep the lovey-dovey stuff for behind closed doors.
So - love your wife, express both verbal and physical affection to your wife and most of all - give her lots of money and gifts, if you can. The secret to Shalom Bayit is that if you want shalom - buy it!
But keep the lovey-dovey stuff for behind closed doors.
