The pasuk says - ויאמר האדם זאת הפעם עצם מעצמי ובשר מבשרי לזאת יקרא
אשה כי מאיש לקחה זאת על כן יעזוב איש את אביו ואת אמו ודבק באשתו והיו לבשר אחר
Adam said - this time, bone from my bones and flesh from my flesh, this will be called a woman [אשה] for she was taken from man [איש]. Therefore, a man should leave his mother and father and cling to his wife and they should be as one flesh.
Two wonders....
- What is the meaning of the superfluous עצם מעצמי ובשר מבשרי - "bone from my bones and flesh from my flesh" - it would have been sufficient to mention either the bone or the flesh - why both?
- Instead of concluding with just והיו לבשר אחד the pasuk SHOULD have concluded "and they should be as one flesh and one [set of] bone[s]" just as earlier we mentioned both flesh and bone. It is almost like the pasuk forgot that a few words before it spoke about both flesh and bone and only remembered the flesh. הלא דבר הוא!
It would appear that bones and flesh are fundamentally different: It is easy to connect flesh because it is soft but flesh also comes apart more easily. Bones are the opposite, more difficult to connect because they are so hard but once they are connected they don't come apart so easily [see the Gr"a on Mishlei 10/20 which I learn on Skype with R' Daniel Simcha ben Chava Reizel li-zivug hagoon who says something that shtims ["מתאים"] very nicely with what we just said].
There are also two types of marital bonds. There is the bond of goyim which is like flesh [and most of the reason they get married...] and is easily created. The Rambam [Ishus 1/1] says that when a non-Jew meets a girl wherever [at a bar, a Yankee game, the Great Lawn in Central Park, a museum, a chabad telethon] and they like each other, he takes her home and - PRESTO - they are married [if they choose to be]. But like flesh it also comes apart more easily. To divorce a woman he just sends her away, she rents her own pad on 93rd and Amsterdam and - PRESTO - they are divorced [Melachim 9/8]. That easy. [Even easier than the ad I always see in New York "Get divorced for only 360 dollars" or something like that].
For a Jew it is far more complicated and thus like "bone" [עצם - A Jew should be getting married for who the girl really is בעצם and not just how pretty she is or how rich her father is, which seems to make girls even prettier in boy's eyes. Crrrrazzzy worlllddddd. Money-money-money-money.$$$$$$$$] To get married you need two kosher witnesses and that the man should give the woman money [AGAIN MONEY!] or the like [and a 16 piece band, a caterer who slicks his hair back and asks the rabbi if he is ready (when I am the "rabbi" the caterer and I talk so much we become almost best friends although at a recent wedding I got really annoyed with him because the chuppah was supposed to be before shkiya and we had already signed the ksubah and he was CHILLIN'), a wedding hall with waterfalls outside, young gentile men who drive away with your really expensive car after you willingly hand over the keys, high ceilings, fancy carpets, music in the bathroom and expensive paintings owned by the Mafia, a huuuuge shmorg, a long chuppah with a playbill so that you know all of the names of ALL of the bridesmaids, a bar where you can drink more liquid than there is in Niagra Falls etc. etc.]. To get divorced is also more complicated. Sending her packing is not enough and you need a kosher get.
Adam was referring to both a non-Jewish and Jewish marriage [we are all his descendants] so he said BOTH עצם מעצמי and בשר מבשרי. At the end of the pasuk however he was referring soley to the Gentile union as per Rashi here and Sanhedrin 58a so the pasuk only says והיו לבשר אחד referring to the non-Jewish marriage.
In the sefer די באר on this pasuk, Rav Mann goes on to explain זיווג ראשון and זיווג שני based on these two types of marriage, עיי"ש!
[You can use this Torah for an aufruff or sheva brachos speech - free of charge. At Mevakesh, not everything is about money....]
