More On The Filial Obligation

Regarding the recent post about the Satmar boy who is in the army...

Moshe argued with Hashem at the burning bush for 7 days. He didn't want to be the redeemer of the Jewish people at the expense of his brother Aharon who was the leader at that time. He didn't want to hurt his brothers feelings by taking his job. The baalei mussar ask, what does it matter what Aharon feels?? The redemption of the Jewish people is at stake. Let his brother get a little offended. Who cares???

The answer is that if redeeming the Jewish people is done at the expense of someone's feelings - it's not worth it! Moshe was only willing to go after he was assured that Aharon would be happy for him.

Even if one believes that serving in the Army is the biggest mitzva in the Torah-  should it be done if such great heartache is caused to one's parents? Is it the heartache they have seeing their son cut off his peyos, change his clothing, lifestyle, attitudes etc. etc. not enough?

I am not judging this boy. I don't know the details of his situation and even if I did I leave the judging up to judges and li-havdil Hashem. But the point I would like to make is that to cause ANY human being pain is a terrible sin. It is even a sin to cause an ANIMAL pain. But to pain one's parents is a sin of the first order.

We live in a generation where again and again we see children causing their parents great heartache. This is extremely heartrending. It is only after one becomes a parent that he can fully understand the pain and distress that a child can cause a parent.

If you are fortunate enough to have parents - try to think of ways to make them feel good. About how many people can you say "I owe him my very life?". How many people's honor made it into the aseres hadibros?? It is pointed out by many that the first five dibros are between man and G-d while the last five are between man and man. Kibbud Av V'aim is in the first five. Meaning - it is nothing less that the honor of Hashem himself that is at hand.

Army shmarmy - love, respect and revere your parents. You owe it to them [פריעת חוב בלשון חכמינו] and they earned it.   

[Note: If parents make unreasonable demands or try to stop one from keeping mitzvos then while respect is still necessary, obedience is not. A competent Rov should be consulted when doubts arise].

Filial means relating to a son or daughter.