"Carlos Ray “Chuck” Norris, famous actor and fighter, died yesterday afternoon at his home in Northwood Hills, TX, at the age of 80. Chuck starred in dozens of movies and TV series which have entertained, and continue to entertain, millions of people. He was also a master of martial arts, which was the cause of his initial fame in the movie industry. However, after the minor inconvenience of his death, Chuck has made a full recovery, and is reported to be doing quite well.
It has also been reported that the Coronavirus is in self isolation for 14 days due to being exposed to Chuck Norris."
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For the record, I ALSO have a black belt. Orthodox Jews call it a "gartel".
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Chuck Norris doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
Once a cobra bit Chuck Norris’ leg. After five days of excruciating pain, the cobra died.
Chuck Norris doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he’s pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin. Its descendants are now known as giraffes.
Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.
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NOTE: All humor aside - Chuck is alive and well.
