Kiruv website:
If I were to step onto the scale, the number would be the highest it’s ever been. In the past, I’d be devastated about this. But now, it doesn’t faze me, because I’m the happiest I’ve ever been and finally have a positive view of my body.
I couldn’t imagine feeling this way just a few years ago, because all my life I thought I was fat… and that made me worthless. If only I’d lose those “extra pounds,” I would be satisfied with how I looked. I would finally be happy.
I realized that I was overweight in middle school and got serious about dieting after my bat mitzvah, sometime during the seventh grade. It was in the air. Other girls my age did it. I thought it was normal. I also thought it was normal to view my body in a negative light, to think that I was fat and not beautiful.
I thought it was normal to view my body in a negative light, to think that I was fat and not beautiful.
I had a food journal where I kept track of every piece of food that entered my mouth. I’d drag myself out of bed at 6 a.m. to run before school. I thought about diet and exercise constantly. I looked great on the outside – I lost 30 pounds by the time eighth grade rolled around and I was a petite size 6 – but on the inside, nothing changed. I still felt exactly the same as I always had: fat, ugly, and awkward. I assumed the problem was that I was not small enough. Or maybe I was just inherently unpretty and doomed to a life of feeling this way.
I kept trying to lose more weight, to push myself harder, to eat foods that were bland and punish myself when I had “junk food” or slept in and missed my morning run. Honestly, I was lucky not to have developed a full-blown eating disorder.
I Decided I Was Done
When I was 17, as I stood in the kitchen one morning measuring non-fat milk and pouring it on top of plain corn flakes, I decided I was done. I couldn’t live like this anymore. I wasn’t living. I was torturing myself.
I started eating intuitively, focusing on foods that gave me energy and made me feel good. I slept as much as I needed to and exercised because it improved my mood and it was fun. I didn’t punish myself when my dress size went up. I felt good, and that was apparent. I was glowing.
This experience not only taught me how important it is to love my body and myself, but also that other women were suffering as well. I noticed that the messages they received from clothing retailers weren’t helping. If you weren’t petite, you didn’t deserve to look good. There was no nice clothing for women above a size 12. I wanted to change fashion and make shopping a less stressful and traumatic experience for women who didn’t fit the mold, just like me.
So when I was in my early 20s, I started designing modest clothing for women. I called my company Impact Fashion, and we now carry sizes 2-28. The clothing is high-fashion and beautiful, because women deserve to feel gorgeous at any size.
The idea that beauty stops at a size 12 is ingrained so far deep in all of us that looking good was actually a shock to some of my customers.
Over and over again, I’ve heard the same thing from my customers: “I’ve never even felt pretty. No one let me feel pretty. Your clothes have shown me that it’s possible.” The idea that beauty stops at a size 12 is ingrained so far deep in all of us that looking good was actually a shock to some of my customers. The women I now dress had very few options before; I’m honored to be able to provide them with more, and also make a positive impact on the clothing industry.
In my brand messaging, I make sure to talk about my personal story and show women of all sizes that they don’t have to feel bad about their bodies. There is a different path they can take. They can love themselves, no matter what the number on the scale says.
It took a while for me to learn this. But now that I have, I hope to spread that lesson to the world, while making it a little more beautiful with my designs and my loving messages at the same time.
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I wish the author only the best. No offense. It is great that she produces clothing for women of all sizes. But there are numerous problems with this story.
1] A person should be focused primarily on their soul. The body is just an outer packaging. So is clothing. The body is around for a short time and is then gently placed in the ground and buried when it then disintegrates. The soul is forever.
2] Being overweight is not merely a question of aesthetics. It is unhealthy. Being unhealthy is a religious infraction [if one can help it]. You can't properly serve Hashem with a body that is not functioning properly. One shouldn't come to terms with being unhealthy. Diet and exercise must always be a critical component of one's life [see אורות התשובה פרק א].
3] One shouldn't eat whatever makes them feel good. One of the main tasks in life is to control the תאוות האכילה. It is no coincidence that the classical fall of man revolved around food [hint - Gan Eden]. The job of all of mankind since then is to be in control of their gastronomical desires. Our restaurant and vacation culture is a main enemy of Kedushas Ha-achila. It is not even on most people's radars. I would tell you a line from a letter of the Chazon Ish but I fear it might ruin your appetite and I don't want that... Junk food is junk. Junk belongs in the garbage - not in your body.
4] Girls must be educated from the start that their value has nothing to do with how pretty they are or feel. It is one of the distortions of modern culture which is obsessed with beauty. Remember that pasuk we sing in Aishes Chayil before the Friday night seudah.... [There is nothing wrong with feeling pretty - the problem is when self esteem is based fully on that element.]
5] Even better than focusing on one's own body and soul is being focused on others and Hashem. That is one key to success AND happiness in life.
