You've already seen the headlines — conservatives are trying to BAN BOOKS! On a recent conference call with rabbis, Joe Biden derided this terrible phenomenon: "At the same time that books are being banned — if you can believe that, in the United States of America, that books are being banned in our schools — and history is being erased, we must also answer lies with truth."
Now, there is confirmation of this nefarious far-right plot to censor what American kids are allowed to read by removing them from school libraries while keeping them freely available everywhere else.
With the help of the American Library Association, we have obtained the following list of beautiful children's literature conservative fascists are trying to ban:
Beauty & The Beastiality: No child should be deprived of the chance to enjoy this classic tale of romance and unspeakably unnatural acts.
How To Make A Homemade Bomb And Do Fentanyl With A Stranger Without Your Parents Finding Out: Can you believe those fascists don't want kids to read this?
The Necronomicon: A beloved literary work filled with demon resurrection passages compiled by a race of beings known as The Dark Ones. And puritanical conservatives want to deprive our children of this knowledge!
Of Mice And Trans-Men: An inspiring turn-of-the-century tale combining migrant workers and radical gender theory.
Yaroslav Hunka — A Profile In Courage: This real-life story of a Canadian-honored military hero and Nazi supporter will help children become everything they can be.
Now tell us — what on earth is so harmful about those books? Read them to your kids while you can, before those dangerous culture-destroying conservatives burn them all!
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Mussar Haskel: Keep tabs on what your children are reading and watching - and your *parent's child* too, for that matter...
