Wonder of wonders.

I heard the following idea during this lecture. Every person searches for an external reality that shtims [fits] with his internal world. So if he is violent, he will search for violence around him because it fits with his own personal orientation. If he is kind he will seek out people who are kind etc. etc. People are comfortable when things match up.

This explains why we choose specific spouses or friends.

If somebody wants to change his internal reality the way to do it is to surround himself with positive influences. We actually have something [physiological] in our brains that make us mimic those around us. I heard this fact and it helped me understand why whenever I see someone adjusting his glasses on his nose I feel an almost irresistible urge to do the same.