PHOENIX, AZ — Attendees at Turning Point's AmFest 2025 event experienced an awkward moment last night, as Tucker Carlson interrupted his own speech for an evening prayer to Mecca.
Onlookers were startled as Tucker halted a lengthy speech on cancel culture and looked at his phone. "Ope! Looks like it's that time again!" said Tucker to the confused audience as he rolled out an ornate prayer rug and began to kneel. "It's time to pray. That's important, obviously, and we're going to pray together, clearly. I mean, seriously, obviously. Why wouldn't we? HAHAHAHAHA!"
Sources said Carlson then began chanting in a haunting, melodic voice.
"Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Allahu Akbar, Allaaaaaaaahu Akbar.
Ashhadu alla ilaha illallah.
Ashhadu anna Muhammadar Rasulullah."
An uproar immediately started among the crowd, with confused audience members trying to make sense of the incident.
"Woah! What's he sayin'? Is he speaking terrorist?" said one agitated audience member. "I think he's speakin' terrorist! Get off the stage, terrorist! Booooooo!"
Carlson reportedly grew agitated as the crowd began to jeer and boo. "You're trying to censor me! This is cancel culture!" he cried. "How dare you! This is loathsome, obviously!"
At publishing time, Carlson had expressed hope for a much warmer reception at the upcoming QatarFest.
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Not Satire:
As is well known - Carlson has recently announced that he is buying a house in Qatar. As he put it: “I have been criticized as being a tool of Qatar, and I just want to say, which you already know, which is I have never taken anything from your country and don’t plan to,” Carlson told Qatari Prime Minister Sheikh Mohammed bin Abdulrahman bin Jassim Al Thani at the Doha Forum. “I am, however, tomorrow buying a place in Qatar. ... In Doha ... I like the city, I think it’s beautiful, but also to make the statement that I’m an American and a free man, and I’ll be wherever I want to be, which I think is important.”
So to Tucker Carlson, the way to show you are an American is not to invest your money in the US but in Hamas' best friend Qatar.
Thank YOU Tucker for this lesson in true Americanism.
