In response to the recent Asifa where 20k women willingly gathered in order to hear divrei chizuk about the dangers of the internet, a women who calls herself "Chasidishe Veibel" wrote as follows:
We are taught from a young age that it is our responsibility not to arouse the men. Don't attract attention with your clothes, your hair, your voice. But remember, you're the עקרת הבית. Be a good wife, do what your husband says.
We try our best. We cut our daughters' hair short, we wear long wide skirts, we don't use our beautiful voices to sing. We move aside for men on the street, we don't drive, we don't involve ourselves in politics.
We daven quietly in shul, we don't print our faces in magazines, we cover up our young daughters' legs. We swim fully clothed, we sit at the back of the bus, we don't express our talents. We try our best not to arouse the men.
But this is not enough. The powers to be have decided to further hide women. We shall not speak on the street at all.
We are now told not to use the internet to network and build successful businesses. Not to post our talented voices/art/dance. Don't be seen. Don't be heard. We try our best, but it is not enough...
Firstly, if you don't like it then you can leave. Nobody is holding you hostage. The reality is that only a very small fraction of chasidic/charedi women leave the fold. They are vocal, they write books, they make youtube videos - but they are rare. This is b/c most Charedi women find the lifestyle meaningful and rewarding.
Second - this is feminist-nonsense-garbage-drivel [to be generous]. She presents it as if there is some male hegemony that has nothing better to do than repress poor, suffering, meek women. And, nebuch, she just can't take it anymore. Life is so hard. We can't be ourselves b/c you men are a bunch of power seeking, perverted, sex-maniacs.
The reality is that it has NOTHING to do with men repressing women. It is not an adversarial relationship, a battle of men vs. women and the more powerful men are winning and oppressing poor female souls. We ARE in a battle and the battle is against EVIL. We are actually in it TOGETHER. It is not men vs. women but men and women vs. the yetzer hara. It is also men and women battling on behalf of Kedusha. THAT is the goal. קדושים תהיו. We are COMMANDED by HASHEM [not by men] to be holy. This is not something we see as burdensome. We are PROUD of it. We, men and women together, are proud of the fact that women [and men!!] act and dress modestly. We would NEVER want to be like the rest of the world where any and every woman's body is free game for everyone to see and enjoy. We would never want to be part of a society where being visible and famous is viewed as a positive goal to pursue. We are so grateful that religious men don't [or shouldn't] have any female friends and religious women don't have any male friends. Our intergender relationships are reserved exclusively for close family members.
We don't suppress female talent and expression. We just say that a women putting up a video of herself on youtube singing and dancing is against the most basic standards of Jewish modesty. Ditto with Facebook. Frum, married women post pictures of themselves and these "impure members of foreign nations" ["שמוציקע גויים"] write to her "I really like your beautiful smile. Can we be friends?".
"We cover up our daughters legs". OY VEY!!! No miniskirts. What an oppressive religion!!! Such suffering. Makes Auschwitz seem like a walk in the park.
"We don't use our beautiful voices to sing". Sing all you want, lady. Just not in front of a male audience. Men are attracted by women's singing voices and we don't want men imagining themselves in bed with you. You don't believe that men think that way? That is only b/c you have never been a man for a day. Just about ALL men think that way. We are wired for that and no amount if feminist gibberish will change that. So sing - but not on youtube. You don't like the Halachos that קול באשה ערוה, שיער באשה ערוה, שוק באשה ערוה? Sorry. We are bound by the Torah and Chazal and we keep AND RESPECT Halacha even if it doesn't fit with the contemporary leftist narrative of propriety. We are מקבל עול מלכות שמים which requires us to keep laws even when inconvenient or when we don't understand them.
"But remember, you're the עקרת הבית. Be a good wife, do what your husband says." "No!!!", scream the feminists! DON'T listen to your husband. FIGHT him tooth and nail. Assert your feminine power. Show him who is boss. Make sure that he does NO LESS that 50 percent of all household chores. Put him down. Remind him how much men have oppressed women over the ages and you are going to redress that evil by making his life MISERABLE. It is HIS fault. He is male and thus guilty-by-gender. But he also must work VERY hard to support you. He signed on when he gave you a Ksubah. He must support you for all of his life and after. He must respect you. He must revere you. He must pay all of your medical bills. He must father the children you so desperately want and make sure to always be there for them. He must attend to your emotional needs. He has a big job to do and he is going to suffer doing it. You will make sure of that! If he wants to go daven or learn - you will accuse him of shirking his true responsibility of being your servant. It is not about Hashem or Torah. It is about your power.
"We try our best, but it is not enough..." The authentic Jewish approach is that we try our best, realize that we aren't perfect and then try again. That is life for both men and women. We can always daven better, do more chesed, learn more Torah, be kinder to our familiy members and neighbors etc. That is the process of life. A constant striving for perfection in all areas. We don't complain about it and blame the men that it is THEIR fault for not being satisfied.
I don't know what was said as the Asifa. I wasn't invited. But one thing is for sure. This is not men against women. That is the feminist rhetoric-baloney. It is the Jewish people as a whole trying to attain higher levels of Kedusha in order to become closer to Hashem. The Internet is clearly an obstruction to the achievement of this goal. We need it. We use it. But it must be done with great care and Yiras Shomayim. There is almost no end to the stories of egregious breaches of the most basic standards of Kedusha perpetrated by this medium. Affairs between married people, kids and adults going off the derech, addictions to znus and many many many other מרעין בישין.
Women like "Chasidishe Veibel" are toxic enemies of many of the holy ideals and values that Klal Yisrael stands for. It is important to remember that the vast majority of women בנות ישראל הקדושות don't feel like her and don't believe in her venomous blood libel against men and Torah.
