Cal N.
Based on a tip from a reader, I recently tumbled down an esoteric rabbit hole aimed at the writing habits of the novelist Danielle Steel. Even if you don’t read Steel, you’ve almost certainly heard of her work. One of the best-selling authors of all time, Steel has written more than 190 books [!!!!] with a 1946 manual typewriter [!!!] that have cumulatively sold over 800 million copies [!!!!]. She publishes multiple titles per year, often juggling up to five projects simultaneously. Unlike James Patterson, however, who also pushes out multiple books per year, Steel writes every word of every manuscript by herself - except of course the Haskamos of Gedolei Yisrael.
How does she pull this off? She works all the time. According to a 2019 Glamour profile, Steel starts writing at 8:30 am and will continue all day and into the night. It’s not unusual for her to spend 20 to 22 hours at her desk. Sometimes when feeling the crunch she will do 24 consecutive hours [taking breaks of course to daven and say her daily tehillim and learn two halachos of shmiras halashon]. The Rav Chaim Kniyevsky להבדיל אלף אלפי הבדלות of the secular world. She eats one piece of toast for breakfast [it is not clear if she adds butter] and nibbles on bittersweet chocolate bars for lunch [a highly recommended diet by the standard of any nutritionist. Not]. A sign in her office reads: “There are no miracles. There is only discipline.” Another sign reads "Everything Is A Miracle. #no-more-kochi-votzem-yadi". She says that she wants to die while typing when her head just falls on the typewriter. She wants to be buried with her typewriter so she can keep writing in the grave.
These details fascinate me. Steel is phenomenally successful, but her story reads like a Greek tragedy [for people who don't understand Greek, of course]. She could, of course, decide to only write a single book per year, and still be a fabulously bestselling author, while also, you know, sleeping. She could also stop writing altogether. She has more than enough money and has written more books than just about anybody in world history. Indeed, her cultural impact might even increase if she slowed down, as this extra breathing room might allow her to more carefully apply her talent.
But there’s a primal action-reward feedback loop embedded into the experience of disciplined effort leading to success. Once you experience its pleasures it’s natural to crave more. For Steel, this dynamic *seems* to have spiraled out of control. Like King Midas, lost in his gilded loneliness, Steel cannot leave the typewriter. That might explain her very [not] successful relationship history [see further]. She earned everything she hoped for, but in the process she lost the ability to step away and enjoy it. She doesn't even allow herself the pleasure of enjoying a barbeque with her five ex-husbands and who knows how many children on a Sunday afternoon.
I think this dynamic, to one degree or another, impacts anyone who has been fortunate enough to experience some success in their field. Doing important work matters and sometimes this requires sacrifices. But there’s also a deep part of our humanity that responds to these successes — and the positive feedback they generate — by pushing us to seek this high at ever-increasing frequencies. It's addictive. People can't get enough of the dopamine rush.
One of the keys to cultivating a deep life seems to be figuring out how to ride this razor’s edge [and also how to avoid using a razor on your face]; to avoid the easy cynicism of dismissing effort altogether, the עצלות that the sifrei mussar rail against, while also avoiding Steel’s 20-hour days. This is an incredibly hard challenge, yet it’s one that receives limited attention and generates almost no formal instruction [unless you read my blog]. I don’t have a simple solution but I thought it was worth emphasizing. For a notable subset of talented individuals burnout is less about their exploitation by others than it is their uneasy dialogue with themselves.
-------
Despite everything, Steel has found time for an ACTIVE family life. Hold on tight: Steel married French-American banker Claude-Eric Lazard in 1965 at age 18 and gave birth to their daughter Beatrix. Steel and Lazard separated in 1972. While still married to Lazard, Steel met Danny Zugelder while interviewing an inmate in a prison near Lompoc, California, where Zugelder was also incarcerated. He moved in with Steel when he was paroled in June 1973, but returned to prison in early 1974 on robbery and rape charges. After receiving her divorce from Lazard in 1975, she married Zugelder in the prison canteen [!!!]. During their relationship, Steel suffered multiple miscarriages. She divorced Zugelder in 1978. [What a surprise!!] Lesson - Don't develop relationships with other men while married and think twice before marrying ex-cons.
Steel married her third husband, William George Toth, in 1978, while pregnant with his child, Nick. They divorced in March 1981.
Steel married for the fourth time in 1981, to vintner John Traina. Traina adopted Steel's son Nick and gave him his family name. Together they had additional five children, Samantha, Victoria, Vanessa, a fashion stylist, Maxx, and Zara. Determined to spend as much time as possible with her children, Steel often wrote at night, making do with only four hours of sleep. Steel and Traina divorced in 1995.
Steel married for a fifth time, to Silicon Valley financier Thomas James Perkins, but the marriage ended after four years in 2002. Steel has said that her novel The Klone and I was inspired by a private joke between herself and Perkins. In 2006, Perkins dedicated his novel to Steel.
Really none of my business, but reading her biography makes me believe that she should carve out some time, like just about everybody should, for therapy.
