A young couple gets engaged. Mazel Tov!
During the engagement period, the chosson tells his kallah that he has a very, very close friend he wants to invite to the wedding. The kallah, wanting to be supportive, says, "Of course!"
"We do everything together," the boy explains. "I daven with this friend, learn with him, exercise with him, and shop with him. I even go to the bathroom with this friend. The list goes on."
The kallah is getting spooked, but she knows her chosson is a rational, normal fellow, so she tries to stay calm. Then, he drops the bomb: "I hope you don’t mind if my friend joins us under the chuppah, then in the yichud room... and then comes home with us to spend the night in our bedroom." 馃槻 "He will be a permanent fixture in our bedroom throughout our years of marriage so you should get used to him from the get-go. There are going to be many times when you want to be close but I will be busy with my friend so nothing will be happening. Nothing personal."
The kallah is about to faint. Before she loses consciousness, she gasps, "Who is this friend?!"
The boy says nothing. He silently pulls a device out of his pocket. "This," he says, "is my friend."
The Uninvited Guest in Shul
What business does a phone have in shul? When we come to commune with the Master of the Universe, bringing a phone essentially says: "I can't be totally present with You, Hashem. That would be boring. I need a backup in case someone texts."
Where I daven, almost everyone has a kosher phone, and almost everyone brings it inside. During nearly every Shemoneh Esrei, at least one starts ringing—usually playing a lively Jewish song at the most solemn moment. During Chazaras HaShatz, people are playing with their phones. As they leave, they are already checking notifications.
To paraphrase Dr. Seuss:
"Phones here, phones there, phones, phones EVERYWHERE! I do not like phones everywhere; I do not like them, Sam-I-Am."
Imagine they would have a line of pay phones [for the elderly group of readers who remember such things] in a shul! Inconceivable. 讞讬诇讜诇 讘讬转 讛讻谞住转 讜诪拽讚砖 诪注讟. Today that is essentially what we have.
A Distraction from the Divine
Why do people bring phones to their chavrusas? There is literally nothing more important on or above this earth than Talmud Torah. Bringing a phone signals that the learning is secondary to an inane WhatsApp group. 讜讻讚讬 讘讝讬讜谉 讜拽爪祝!
The Million-Dollar Question
We need to ask ourselves one simple question: "Is this phone, at this moment, making me a better Eved Hashem?" If the answer is yes, great!
If the answer is no, it shouldn't be there.
The phone, of course, is a symptom. There are underlying problems which need to be addressed.
I have so much more to say about this topic, but my pocket is vibrating and I just got a call... I have to go! 馃槉
