B'chasdei Hashem, over the past almost 20 years, Beis Mevakesh Lev has produced over 13,300 audio shiurim and over 31,000 written posts, unmatched by any one-person website - all completely free of charge. There are no paywalls or anything else. Now we are turning to you for help so we can continue - any amount will help. Even 99 cents! Thank you to my sweetest and most beloved friends!!!:-)!!
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If you’ve spent any time on the internet, in Pennsylvania, or at a wedding lately, you’ve likely encountered The Shapiro. The problem is that "The Shapiro" is actually three different people who have apparently decided to share a surname and a general "fast-talking overachiever" energy just to see if we’re paying attention. It’s time to clear the air before we accidentally elect a pop star to the Governor's mansion or try to debate a singer on the merits of a flat tax.
The Lineup: Who is Who?
The Shapiro Primary Habitat Distinguishing Feature Most Likely To...
Ben
A podcast studio with very high-speed internet. Speaks at approximately 400 words per minute. Destroy a college sophomore with "Facts and Logic."
Josh
Harrisburg, Pennsylvania. Polished suits and a "Dad who fixes the Wi-Fi" vibe. Repair a bridge in record time while eyeing the White House.
Mordechai
Jewish wedding stages and Spotify playlists. Incredible vocal range and infectious joy. Make 500 people in a catering hall jump simultaneously.
Common Points of Confusion.
1. The "Fast Talker" Fallacy - You might think you’re listening to Ben Shapiro dismantle a political opponent. But listen closer. Is he talking about the inherent flaws of Keynesian economics, or is he hitting a high C while singing about Simcha?
If there’s a synth-beat behind the rhetoric, you’re actually listening to Mordechai Shapiro. Conversely, if the person is singing but it sounds like a legal deposition, that’s just Ben trying to explain why he doesn't like the Barbie movie.
2. The Power Suit Paradox - If you see a Shapiro in a sharp navy suit standing behind a podium, look at the background. State Flags? That’s Josh Shapiro. He’s likely announcing a bipartisan budget deal or fixing a literal hole in I-95. A "Daily Wire" Logo? That’s Ben. He’s likely announcing that your favorite TV show is actually a sign of cultural collapse. A kallah and a crying bubby? That’s Mordechai. He’s about to drop an Im Eshkacheich that will blow the speakers out.
3. The "State of the Union" Mix-up - There was a brief moment in 2024 where people thought Josh Shapiro might be the VP pick. Half the country panicked, wondering if the Vice Presidential debates would now be 4 hour musical telethons (Mordechai) or if the debates would be settled by whoever could say "hypothetically" the most times in a single breath (Ben).
Pro Tip: If the Shapiro in question is being polite to a journalist, it’s Josh. If he’s arguing with the journalist, it’s Ben. If he’s inviting the journalist to dance in a circle, it’s Mordechai.
How to Survive a Shapiro Encounter - If you find yourself in a room with a Shapiro and you aren't sure which one it is, use this simple Diagnostic Test: Hand him a microphone. If he starts a timer and says "Let's say, for the sake of argument...", Run. You’re about to be in a YouTube thumbnail. If he starts talking about "investing in our schools and protecting the right to vote," Ask for a tax break. You're talking to the Governor. If he shouts "FRIENDS! ARE YOU READY?" and the bass drops, Start dancing. You're at a concert.
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LOCATION: A private dining room at a non-descript Glatt Kosher restaurant. There is one (1) podium, one (1) state seal, and one (1) massive subwoofer in the corner.
CHARACTERS:
BEN: Wearing a suit and a headset he forgot to take off.
JOSH: Wearing a suit and a "Pennsylvania is the coolest" lapel pin.
MORDECHAI: Wearing a suit, but it’s sparkly, and he is currently beatboxing.
BEN: (Checking his watch) Okay, let's say, for the sake of argument, that we are all hungry. If we are hungry, and the waiter has not arrived, then logically, the kitchen is failing to meet the demands of the free market.
JOSH: Ben, please. I’ve just brokered a deal between the teachers' union and the turnpike commission; I can handle a waiter. We need a bipartisan consensus on the appetizers. I’m leaning toward the hummus plate—it’s inclusive, it’s stable, and it’s a proven winner in the suburbs.
MORDECHAI: (Jumping onto a chair) GUYS! Can we get some ENERGY in here?! The hummus is fire, but if we don't have spicy tuna rolls, is it even a simcha? [Starts clapping rhythmically] Chevre!!!! Let’s get some joy in this menu!
BEN: Mordechai, your emotional appeal is noted, but it’s intellectually inconsistent. You can’t have "simcha" without a foundation of appetizers that don't fall apart under scrutiny. Also, the tuna is $24. That’s inflationary. My wife—who is a doctor, by the way, we have four children—says raw fish is a biological gamble we can’t afford.
JOSH: (Sighing, taking out a map) Look, I’ve looked at the polling. 60% of the table wants the brisket. 40% wants the salmon. I am prepared to sign an executive order for a family-style platter that bridges the gap. We’re going to build a bridge to the main course, and we’re going to do it ahead of schedule and under budget.
MORDECHAI: [Grabs a breadstick and uses it as a microphone] I hear you, Josh! I feel the spirit! But does the brisket have... NESHAMAAAAAAA?! Does it make you want to dance?! I’m calling the chef. I want a remix of the chicken soup. More salt! More bass! More Simcha!
BEN: Hypothetically, if you add more bass to the soup, the liquid oscillates. If the liquid oscillates, it splashes my tie. If it splashes my tie, the Left wins. Is that what you want, Mordechai? To hand a victory to the radical secularists because of your rhythmic soup requirements?
JOSH: (Rubbing his temples) I miss Harrisburg. At least there, I only have to deal with the State Senate.
MORDECHAI: [Sprinting around the table] EVERYBODY CLAP YOUR HANDS! WE’RE ORDERING THE SAMPLER PLATTER! ONE-TWO-THREE-GO!
BEN: I’m not clapping. Clapping is a collectivist activity that ignores the individual’s right to remain still.
JOSH: (To the waiter) Just bring us everything. And put it on the state's tab. Wait, no—put it on Ben’s. He’s got the highest ad revenue.
BEN: That’s a violation of property rights! But... logically... it is a tax write-off. Fine.
MORDECHAI: [High-fives the waiter] AMAZING! [Starts singing a high-octave version of Ain Od Milvado.]
